Books aside, if you asked a college freshman today who the Greatest Generation is, they might respond by pointing in a mirror. Young people's unprecedented level of self-infatuation was revealed in a new analysis of the American Freshman Survey, which has been asking students to rate themselves compared to their peers since 1966. Roughly 9 million young people have taken the survey over the last 47 years. Self-love: New data suggests students today are convinced of their own greatness regardless of whether they've accomplished anything Pyschologist Jean Twenge and her colleagues compiled the data and found that over the last four decades there's been a dramatic rise in the number of students who describe themselves as being 'above average' in the areas of academic ability, drive to achieve, mathematical ability, and self-confidence. But in appraising the traits that are considered less invidualistic - co-operativeness, understanding others, and spirituality - the numbers either stayed at slightly decreased over the same period. Researchers also found a disconnect between the student's opinions of themselves and actual ability. While students are much more likely to call themselves gifted in writing abilities, objective test scores actually show that their writing abilities are far less than those of their 1960s counterparts. Also on the decline is the amount of time spent studying, with little more than a third of students saying they study for six or more hours a week compared to almost half of all students claiming the same in the late 1980s. Important online: Trends like social media, celebrity culture, and easy credit contribute to students feeling as if they're more successful than they really are Though they may work less, the number that said they had a drive to succeed rose sharply. These young egotists can grow up to be depressed adults. A 2006 study found that students suffer from 'ambition inflation' as their increased ambitions accompany increasingly unrealistic expectations. 'Since the 1960s and 1970s, when those expectations started to grow, there's been an increase in anxiety and depression,' Twenge said. 'There's going to be a lot more people who don't reach their goals.' Twenge is the author of a separate study showing a 30 per cent increase towards narcissism in students since 1979. Look out for No. 1: Narcissists often reach middle age and find their past full of failed relationships 'Our culture used to encourage modesty and humility and not bragging about yourself,' Twenge told BBC News. 'It was considered a bad thing to be seen as conceited or full of yourself.' Just because someone has high self-esteem doesn't mean they're a narcissist. Positive self-assessments can not only be harmless but completely true. However, one in four recent students responded to a questionnaire called the Narcissistic Personality Inventory with results pointing towards narcissistic self-assessments. Narcissism is defined as excessive self-love or vanity; self-admiration, or being self-centered. Twenge said that's a trait that is often negative and destructive, and blames its boom on several trends - including parenting styles, celebrity culture, social media, and easy credit - for allowing people to seem more successful than they really are. Obsessed: Despite legions of self-help books advising belief in yourself, there's no evidence self-esteem causes success 'What's really become prevalent over the last two decades is the idea that being highly self-confident - loving yourself, believing in yourself - is the key to success,' Twenge said. 'Now the interesting thing about that belief is it's widely held, it's very deeply held, and it's also untrue.' Despite a library's worth of self-help books promoting the idea we can achieve anything if we believe we can, there's very little evidence that raising self-esteem produces positive, real-world outcomes. 'If there is any effect at all, it is quite small,' said Roy Baumeister of Florida State University, who authored a 2003 paper on self-esteem studies. Baumeister found that while successful people did have high-self esteem in many cases, it was unclear what actual caused their success if the first place. Both self-esteem and success were often influenced by another factor. 'Coming from a good family might lead to both high self-esteem and personal success.' Baumeister said. 'Self-control is much more powerful and well-supported as a cause of personal success. Despite my years invested in research on self-esteem, I reluctantly advise people to forget about it.' Twenge compared it to a swimmer trying to learn a turn who needs to believe that learning the skill is possible but who won't actually be aided in acquiring that skill by their belief. 1 in a million: Roughly 9 million freshman have rated themselves in the American Freshman Survey since 1966 'You need to believe that you can go out and do something but that's not the same as thinking that you're great,' Twenge said. Studies suggest weaker students actually perform worse if given encouragement at boosting their self-esteem. 'An intervention that encourages [students] to feel good about themselves, regardless of work, may remove the reason to work hard,' Baumeister found. But if you found yourself bothered by a person always talking about how wonderful they are, remember that their future may not be bright. 'In the long-term, what tends to happen is that narcissistic people mess up their relationships, at home and at work,' Twenge said. Though narcissists may be charming at first, their selfish actions eventually damage relationships. It's not until middle-age they may realize their lives have had a number of failed relationships. And even if they recognize something is wrong they may have a hard time changing. 'It's a personality trait,' says Twenge. 'It's by definition very difficult to change. It's rooted in genetics and early environment and culture and things that aren't all that malleable.' http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...-theyre-special--read-write-barely-study.html
Self-love: New data suggests students today are convinced of their own greatness regardless of whether they've accomplished anything The benchmark for "greatness" is being able to own and operate a 4 th generation I phone. Greatness is hundreds of friends on facebook. Greatness is publishing a you tube video with a red solo cup. Greatness is 40 + hours a week of screen time on WOW. We have a few people right here on ET suffering delusions of grandeur because Barry won a peace prize. I am great and we are great because we have a black president. p.s. blah...........
I've seen it firsthand. My gf has a 15 year old son and though he is a good kid he and his friends don't seem to be getting any... girls. They hang out for hours online and text each other endlessly and there are no girls around whatsoever. They don't go to the school dances or any other activities that would bring them into contact with the fairer sex. They spend hours at home holed up in their bedroom on their i-phone or i-pad. At 15 I was walking around with bloodshot eyes from sneaking out of the house and staying out all night with the wild girls from the neighborhood. Almost everything I did had the singular motivation behind it of getting with the ladies and if I was at home I was eating or sleeping or getting dressed to go. My average length relationship with a girl was about 2 weeks and I guess I dated just about every good looking girl in my highschool except a few seniors that could not abide a freshman. I have so little in common with this young man that there is almost nothing to say to each other and he can't even look me in the eyes. His mom asked me to have "the talk" with him and I gave him a grocery bag with about 100 condoms in it and said "those should last you at least a few weeks". I thought he was going to throw up and die right on the spot. He seems genuinely repulsed by women. There is something wrong with these kids. Its disturbing.
step families are so damned hard, I have heard of almost none that didn't have issues. a bag of rubbers? LOL a guy can't get confidence from electronics, he needs some tough fathering but I think if you tried both he and his mom would stop you.
Isn't that the truth. I have two and my wife has two. Three (all girls) of which lived with us after we married. We had little or no "honey moon" to speak of, virtually all of which was a result of the kids. Now that only one is here, she moved back in a year ago. The wife and I rarely even have a joking disagreement now. Let alone an argument. Unlike most marriages that grow stale or even disintegrate over time ours continues to get better and better. All since the kids moved out.
Let me take this moment to remind you of something you probably already know. The most important thing in the life of a single mother are her children. If the kids aren't getting along well with the new bf then that bf is in trouble. If you want to keep the gf happy so she will keep you happy, make damn sure you keep her kids happy with you! Just sayin.
had my share of pain too, and now that mine and hers are both out independent we are all much happier. My stepdaughter married a doctor- no more financial expectations, I'm in tall cotton.
Good on 'ya mate! My nightmare is that one or more of the kids just stays with us into adulthood because he can't find a job or doesn't obtain an education. My gf seems happy with my interaction with the kids so far. Most of our fighting has more to do with her trying to assess my activities in between when she and I lived together in the early 80s and now. She wants details about what I did (and well... who I did) and I've learned that any information about my relationships during that period of time is going to make her unhappy so there is a natural conflict where she wants information and I am reticent to supply it. She is also touchy about her age (she is a year younger than I) and seems uneasy about the fact that I dated a few younger women over the years. She is a lot more fun than any of those younger women but she has a hard time believing it. Back on subject another thing I've noticed about the college aged people is that they are much more political than I remember being at their age. I don't think I paid any attention to politics until my late 30s (when I started to have some skin in the game). The kids these days are quick to start spouting off about the evil corporations and evil republicans and are voting for the very people that are destroying the economy they are about to enter. I worry about what is going to happen when all of these kids get their degree but then cannot find work. The ones with student loans will have their credit ruined before they even get started!
The whole self-esteem movement has been with us for a couple of centuries actually. I can't stand it really... ever been in a jail? Some of the people with the highest possible self-esteem are locked up for some very bad behavior. Psychopaths have such high self-esteem that they demand everybody respect them even though they might have ZERO accomplishments! Witchcraft sort of has entered the generation under discussion, they are deluded a good bit. I'm able to observe nearly 200 people in my daily life and I know 3 that are doing witchcraft, those 3 are so full of themselves, so overvaluing themselves, so self-centered as to be a source of nausea.. They talk about a God with no personality.. "The Universe" is going to give them things, unbelievable things.. meanwhile they are living some pretty shitty existences.. In fact, out of the 200 those 3 are actually living out nearly the 3 worst existences..