As a manual trader I have had on in the last few days of trading about $4k worth of 1 lot positions on my primary market. However... I am sure what holds me back are deep rooted fears from childhood - we were very thrifty, never spent much and I was always scared to spend money bc I didn't have any. I never felt I would have enough. It's a completely false reality because I have everything anyone would ever need. (Not only this from studying my past trades I have an insane long bias from which I have no idea why. Years ago it was I think very short biased) The only reason I have had down days in the last week was not considering both sides, mainly not taking shortsales. Of course we all grow up with this mentaility we have to work hard for money, and that's the other part of me - I had to work so hard to get to where I am and it took a long time. I was not conditioned to believe I could make 3k per day by doing something that is easy to my eyes. I have a trading plan defined in every way that works and I watch the dollar signs roll by but I don't trust myself, I don't trust my plan and I'm too scared to lose. My technical skill is insane. But I don't trust myself. How do you get rid of the fear? I thought having precancerous polyps in my colon at 29 would help me realize that money doesn't matter in life and that I could die soon, then what ever does this shit matter? The only thing I can think is that maybe by the time I'm 35-50 on my deathbed I won't be scared. By then my dream won't matter to me anymore.