Just tell them that you are a data engineer. If the want an explanation, then say that you collect data, assess risk and probabilities for a living and then sell that information on the open market.
for derivatives, if you mention the word "derivatives" in your description, most people have no clue what that means and won't ask any further questions
Here in the UK you can call yourself a "Spiv" Spiv: British : a man who lives by his wits without regular employment Spiv also happens to be short for "Speculative Investor" and so is a term sometimes used in the City to describe speculative traders. But the word Spiv also has negative connatations: One who shirks work or responsibility; a slacker. A man who lives by his wits, without doing any regular or honest work, esp. one engaged in petty, shady dealings. A smartly dressed person who trades in illicit, black-market or stolen goods. A flashy con artist, often homeless, who lives by his wits. In Scotland Yard usage, a low and common thief.
Just tell them that you sell Iron Condors two standard deviations out on the eve of earnings reports to take advantage of the volatility crush after the release. Their eyes will glaze over and that will end it. And if your desire is to impress them with your market finesse maybe it will work.
Sounds like you sell garden decorations or pet store. Most people don't have a clue what we do, so I steer conversation to their new boat or car, let them feel good about their purchase, while thinking about trading.
I am retired so I actually just tell people I like to follow the financial markets during the day when the market is open. There is almost zero follow up questions. I was just making a joke on my prior post.
I actually like your first reply Illini. If a female asks, you could always say you fix broken-wing butterflies. She'll love you.
I actually did do the Iron Condor thing on earnings for a couple of quarters but there were just too many earnings surprises that resulted in too many max losses. Cute response on the butterflies. I like that.
I ran across another one you could use to really confuse people. Tell them you deal in exotic derivatives like geometric dispersion baskets, corridor variance swap spreads, and skew locks. I have never heard of those, but the "exotic derivatives" would make you sound, well, exotic. It's actually from a good article regarding trading hypsters and flat-out frauds: https://noahpinion.substack.com/p/on-bullshit-in-investing .