On behalf of his father and I, we'd like to profusely apologise to all the members of ET for Aphie's behavior over the past months. After the incident last year with the porn sites we thought that cyber nanny would put an end to his mischeif but sadly we now realise that it wasn't enough. Anyway, Aphie has been sent to bed without his dinner and is now grounded until he has made enough trading to pay for our retirement. What can you expect from a twelve year old????? Gertrude Coil
Allow me to introduce myself. I am Aphie's father. I am truly sorry that he was allowed out of his room that one night back in August, the night he snuck into my den and borrowed 5k to start a trading account. He was heavily sedated when he went to bed and must've had dreams of grandeur. He later confessed that the reason he posted the 5k into 1 million in 18 months forum was solely to show off his riches in front of his ex-girl, who unceromoniously ditched him back in July. She was over for dinner and later they had a big fight downstairs in the living room. Gertie, that's the Mrs., and I were upstairs in bed and we only caught a few snippets of the conversation. Something about a monkey that had a strange disease called smallcox, was it? I couldn't hear that well. Gertie's coil was at full charge and I never miss an opportunity to attract. Like i said, elite traders, I apologize for his getting loose. It won't happen again. On Monday we withdraw what's left of the account (his broker said it's on the order of about 1500.00). He agreed to work double shifts at Burger King until his debt is paid. Yours truly, Alfafa Coil
Actually, I am mostly to blame for the poor lad's malady. Little Aphie has not seen me in years, as his mumsy and daddy banned me from visiting him. His sexual confusion, his attraction to gay porn sites, love of men and need for their approval, is all due to the role I played in his upbringing. You see, Gertrude and my brother Alfafa both had to work while Aphie was a child, and being a homebody........I was left to tend to his nurturing. Well, one thing led to another as I "fiddled about" and by the time the little bugger came of age, Alfafa discovered my "love" of the lad, and I was told never to visit him again. Gerty was so angry with me, that she began calling me that "wicked" Uncle. I look upon those days with little Aphie with such fondness. I just adored giving him his bath, and he always looked so cute wearing his nightshirt and bedclothes. Forever Yours, Uncle Ernie Coil
Not trying to be funny, but you have become a kamikaze pilot and I sincerely suggest you go back into therapy before it's to late.