Ultimate Diet!!!!

Discussion in 'Politics & Religion' started by TM_Direct, May 6, 2004.

  1. I have tried everything known to man to shed the extra 10lbs or so that plague me from beer drinking....i've tried low carb, high car, the cabbage soup diet, jenny craig, low fat vegetarian, sheew!!!! I tried it all.......but then i last week i tried STREP A with a little tonsillitis thrown in and BAM!!!! I lost 15lbs in less then a week!......Im a slim and trim 218Lbs now and feel great!...heres how the diet works:

    come in contact with somebody who has strep or some other virus, like a waiter serving you food..catch it and let it incubate for 48 hours an PRESTO!!! your throat is red and your tonsils are the size and color of plums!! Every time you try to sip even a minute glass of water, your in excruciating pain!!!! It s so simple, anybody can do it.

    Contact your doctor now and see if strep throat is right for you...and if you act now, you can even request different viruses like food poisoning, influenza and of course, our personal favorite, the stomach virus!!

    common side affects include, high grade fever, vomiting, diarrhea, dizziness and bed sores from being bed ridden for three days.

    so if your heading to the beach or to a party and want to look your best, just get a simple virus a week before and shed those unsightly pounds off in a matter of days.
  2. My choice is intestinal enteritis. It works like a charm. Vomiting and constant diarrheas for about a week is worth about 10 pounds. One of the best ways to get it here on the outer banks is to go claming in one of the marinas, but remember to eat them raw. They are really delicious with a little lemon juice.
  3. I found that my MIL's cooking was good for losing about 3-5 pounds per week when she was cooking well. She may have been the worst cook I've ever had the misfortune to experience and my wife agrees.

  4. ....i tried to eat some soup at one point and scolded my throat because i couldn't swallow correctly.......that didn't sound to good did it?
  5. The worst cook that I ever met was my nephew's wife. We went to her house for dinner once and she served boiled beef ribs. I still don't believe it.
  6. i still think the crystal meth diet is faster but at least with strep you can stay home from work. hmm tuff decision.
  7. one word: calories

    another word: vegan

    final word: low fat
  8. The only problem is you will gain back illness related short term weight loss very quickly....probably about two weeks. The body once out of turmoil quickly recovers.

    Permanent lifestyle changes are better than diets. I have given up all "fast food", fries, burgers, cheese, pizza, etc so that I might enjoy my beer also. My cholesterol was getting too high, but it has come way down now. So I feel your pain.

    My personal weakness is a frosty mug of Widmer Hefeweizen from tap, from bottle a distant second choice. A superior summer beverage!

  9. ...so far im down 15lbs and have kept it off...unfortunately, i think its because have the shitz so bad from penicillin !!
  10. Final final word:you twat
    #10     May 7, 2004