and then what are you going to use to pay spousal and child support? you have to realize, they can impute an income for for you, so that they make-up what they think you could make in your chosen profession and then you pay a percentage based upon that hypothetical amount. the big problem is, of course, that you cannot make the payments with hypothetical money. better take it serious, getting married is entering into a conteract, perhaps with lifetime liabuilities.
but, what about sexual compatibility in the relationship. if she is talking about every night and you are a once a week guy, there is going to be a problem with everything else in the relationship. and she might even let harry at the office pick up the slack. it is no small thing. women are doing that to their powerfull and wealthy men.
dude, that was sooooo not the relevant comment to make! i mean can you imagine, somebody actually complaining that they can't keep-up with wifey??#!!#!?3@! LAO (that's short for, "laughing ass off"). i reaaaaaaaaaaaaally don't think any of these posters has that particular problem, and if they do theyed never admit it. however, if she's a natural born skank (not that I have a problem wit'it), well now, that's a different story ... jj
it's a common problem for guys who bust their ass at the job and go home wasted. just to note women rate guys on that level too, probably moreso than good looks and career. if you can cut it in the boardroom, but fail in the bedroom, you have failed with many women.
personally, im a total stud muffin. my ex- was physically attractive and we were very compatible physically, but i got sick of her bitching... thats was a big deal breaker. many a time i told her just to shut-up and id make her rich - she didnt even have to help, just shut-up. i realized that was asking too much. i used to get up early on sundays (3-4 am), work all day and just get tons of stuff done. i remember i went home one sunday at dinner time and she said to me "you never take me dancing anymore". thats a real emotional Kodak moment, i knew we were done. towad the end, i'd rather work than go and put up with her crap. the only reason i was working so hard was her family was draining the dough on a development deal we were doing. then when the deal was done, if got a statement from the acc'tant, which was rarely, there'd be tons of expenses and no revenues. WTF!!!!! i'd be like, "how can the condos be empty, and i paid $500 this month for bottled water for the clients ????" i'd get screamed at for questioning her family's honesty. i kicked her and her parasite in-laws to the curb and made myself & children financially secure. i will NEVER get married again. if you are considering getting married, a prenup is mandatory. if she wont sign now, she'll never sign later. YOU WILL NEVER TRULY KNOW WHO YOU MARRIED UNTIL YOU SIT ACROSS FROM THEM AT THE DIVORCE NEGOTIATIONS. yeah, i know there are a couple of wise asses thinking, "that will never happen to me" or "this guy is in total grudge mode." you wait sucker, no one gets married expecting to get divorced. a marriage is a legally binding contract and just 'cuase you are flat broke now, doesnt mean you wont be bucks up in 10-20 years when she decides to trade you in, or you realize that you are 45 yo, very successful and there are lots of interested babes. you can get hotter chicas than you did in your 20's, or you can go home and get bitched at to buy her a bigger house, another car or another room of expensive new furniture. look, go back and read this thread - i discussed a buddy who pays his wife a ton of dough each month and gave her Millions in real estate - why wouldnt she divorced him - now she dates a rich guy, she doesnt have to work and is a millionaire and doesnt have to SHARE! when she married him she didnt have SQUAT! she was like driving a PINTO! BTW< he has also sworn off marriage, he owns a big biz and flys all over teh country - he has a warm spot wherever he goes. p.s. - we eventually split that property in the settlement, and a year or so ago she gave me 15-cents on the dollar for my 1/2. she told me i could take it or i'd get screwed out of the rest. i took it and it was one less connection with her and the "Munsters". just another haircut. one word: prenup.
OK, nodisrespect, no problem. I'm moreso in QBall's category, though. I let my Johnson do my thinking over the short-term ... and easily spent the next 10 years pay'in up for it. So my prob is that, like Q, I'm kinda too cynical for my own good. 'Cause to tell you the truth gents, I think there are a lot more guys who are jerks and a-holes and wfie beaters and women abusers and deadbeat dads and the lot, than there are sensitive guys who get taken on the first pass (and maybe the 2nd and 3rd too, if you aren't careful). Best, JJ
being prepared is practical not cynical. look there is nothing equitable about Califa divorces. the State knows if they dont make you pay, then they'll have to. is it cynical that if you sign on birth certificate for a child and prove later that its not yours, you STILL HAVE TO PAY. no sir, i was naive when i got married, not now! im still paying tuition. why is it thata woman has a right to continue in a style she hs become accustomed to, even if it kills you to provide. you wprk, you make the money, but you have NO right to live in a certain style. i can get what i want from a relationship w/o a long-term contract.