Some questions to those making a decent middle to upper middle class living as traders who have not reached millionaire status yet: In our society especially in major cities a person social status is determined heavily by their current occupation, right or wrongly. While it is obvious what the social status is of a brain surgeon or mcdonalds worker, I am wondering how people view self employed traders both for friendship and for relationships. Being a self employed trader does not fit into any unique occupational class since it has some white collarish professional elements, blue collarish elements, and even pro gambler elements to it. While I know that every situation is unique and every person is different from your experience, how are mom and pop traders treated socially and in dating as in: 1. What social circles are you accepted in? For instance, if you go to a cocktail party full of doctors, lawyers, and i-banking analysts are you accepted as a fellow professional? Even though trading is a not a traditional business, would you be accepted at some entrepreneurial type function? 2. These days both men and women are to some degree influenced by the social status of a person of the opposite sex. Of course everyone knows of women that prefer 60,000 corporate types to 200,000 plumbing contractors, yet my best friend from college is obsessed with the fact that his wife to be is a lawyer!! Many people prefer white collar mates or blue collar mates. My question is, when dealing with the opposite sex, how are you placed in terms of relationship status: Are you viewed as the equivalent of a high prestige professional, viewed as an ordinary small business owner, viewed as blue collarish, viewed as having an unstable source of income equivalent to pro poker, viewed as lying about the source of your income, etc. I guess the more direct way to sum it up is say how does a guy who earns say 125,000 a year say trading ES(doable) stack up in the dating market compared to say a lawyer earning 90,000 , a corporate middle manager, earning 70,000, a plumbing contractor earning 100,000 etc. Any replies would be appreciated. Thanks
Those who matter don't mind , and those who mind don't matter. I let my ego go long ago (how I perceive others to perceive me), it only causes drama. All my relatives are blue collar hard working people. They joke once in a while that I caused gas prices to go up but it's all in good fun. Edit: as far as dating, if the woman wouldn't date you whether you made 30k a year or 500k a year then don't walk away , RUN!
I hate to break the bad news to you, but traders are regarded almost as low as fast food workers. What will impress a person more is "where" you trade. If you say you trade the e-mini at home they will think degenerate gambler in boxer shorts who surfs porn all day. You tell them you trade for Goldman or Citadel, they will respect you. Look, 90% of traders make less then a fast food worker and the public knows this. Girls know this because if you live in NY or Chicago chances are the girl you are dating or want to date has dated several traders. She knows all too well about their financial status. Like I said, the only thing that can save you is working for a respectable firm. BTW, this is why a lot of traders try to get on TV or into financial journalism, to raise their status a few ticks. Some go into politics, some will buy a bar. If you are trading from home, forget it. Just don't even bother bringing it up to people.
Even trading for a solid firm carries a lot of social stigma these days. You just cant win - if you trade for a bank, you are the scum who created the crisis, if you run a book for a fund - you profiting from other peoples pain.
I don't think it really matters. Far more important is how you dress, act, talk etc. If you carry yourself like a confident professional people will generally treat you as such. More than anything people are intrigued by the novelty, outside of NYC or Chicago traders are very rare. If you really care that much, say "I run a proprietary/futures/derivatives trading business" rather than "I daytrade from a darkened room at home in my underwear."
day trading sounds tacky like "real estate investor" Id like to say I know a thing or two about the dating world and have worked as a bouncer in a nightclub Ive seen about it all. when a girl asks "what do you for a living" she is thinking a few things 1. does he have a job? 2. wonder if his income is good? 3. will this man be acceptable with my friends/family? 4. maybe its interesting or we do the same thing? thats pretty much it if you trade home and live in a shack/apartment dont bring it up if you are insecure about trading home and women and feels kills your mojo rent an office suite and set up shop so its more "professional"
traders who trade from home are indeed tacky. they usually are very frugal so they can have more money in trading account. girls don't like extreme frugalness. plus trade from home have no stories to tell about their work. boring. i feel for daytraders. but it their own darn fault for falling into the trap of "daytrading for living" also they build no resume as daytrading is just participating in zero-sum game. professional poker is the same way.
I just dont tell them, Ive used international assassin before, mexian coyote, and international jewel thief.. I generally find if I tell them the truth .. the conversation is to serious to quickly you end up trying to explain it to them like a kid and they get annoyed.. its better to go with a crazy lie and make it fun.