top 10 reason to invade Mars

Discussion in 'Politics' started by fxtrading, Feb 3, 2004.

  1. Top 11 reasons to invade Mars.

    11. Richard Perle and Paul Wolfowitz believe our forces will be greeted with flowers when they arrive.

    10. Once we kick the ass of the mythological god of war, the rest of the planets in the solar system will fall peacefully in line.

    9. Running out of places to not find bin Laden, Anthrax killer, CIA agent name-leaker, etc..

    8. Secret video shown Saturday morning reveals that Marvin the Martian is a brutal military dictator.

    7. Owes Gore a Coke on the whole "global warming" thing.

    6. If there was water on Mars, their might have been life. If there was life on Mars, then there must be dead things. If there are dead things, there might be fossil fuels.

    5. The invasion will pay for itself through the sale of Mars' ample reserves of Mars bars.

    4. Mars is the front line in the war on imaginary, interplanetary terror (Mars Attacks! (1996), Clinton failed to respond).

    3. As with Iraq, Halliburton pitched the invasion.

    2. Mars itself is an intermediate goal, the ultimate prize is the natural gas of Uranus.

    1. As Condi said, "We don't want the smoking gun to be the earth shattering ka-boom of the Illudium Pew-36 Explosive Space Modulator."
  2. There is a 12th reason: adding more hundreds of billions to the 40 billions for irak and to the 400 billions of military budget that will be asked to the taxpayers :D.

    "WASHINGTON, Jan 21 (Reuters) - President George W. Bush may seek an additional $40 billion or more for military operations in Iraq and Afghanistan next year -- on top of the $400-billion military budget he will send to Congress next month, congressional sources and budget analysts said on Wednesday."

    Where will all this money go ? to Halliburton and tentacular subsidiaries (not exclusively of course I didn't say that they won't be obliged to share a bit with other "competitors" :) ). Rational way to make money on the back of the public naivety and exploiting their need of grandiosity or superiority.

    We had such kind of grandiosity also in France: it was called Concorde the fastest civil plane ever constructed but which has cost a fortune to the Nation's taxpayers.