http://muffmarkets.com/hbs05/2008/01/25/damnit-bess/ There are a lot of sketchy characters in finance. Some people who ran hedge funds donât have any sort of finance background at all, if you can believe that. Or any business education. Iâve been trying to figure out strategies to invest for MuffCap, LLC and I thought that I would talk to some experts who had already been successful investors. Bess played a terrible joke on me. She pointed me to this guy she said had run a really successful hedge fund and that I could learn a lot from him. So I started chatting with him online. It is pretty obvious Bess was joking. I think you can pretty much tell from the chat log. 10:27:41 AM muffiehbs05: Hi. 10:27:43 AM CilantroFP: yo shit 10:27:50 AM muffiehbs05: Yo shit? 10:27:51 AM CilantroFP: hey sorry 10:27:54 AM CilantroFP: wrong im lo0l 10:28:07 AM CilantroFP: whoâs this 10:28:21 AM muffiehbs05: Iâm Muffie, who do you think I am, sheesh 10:28:31 AM CilantroFP: haha no idea 10:29:09 AM muffiehbs05: Well, I read your book and Iâve started a hedge fund (See the details at http://www.muffmarkets.com) and I thought I would say hello and try and, you know, see what I might learn. 10:29:38 AM CilantroFP: cool, hey there! 10:29:46 AM muffiehbs05: Hey there! 10:30:26 AM muffiehbs05: Or, I dunno, maybe there isnât much to learn? 10:30:43 AM CilantroFP: oh your that muffie! 10:30:51 AM muffiehbs05: âThat Muffieâ ? 10:30:57 AM muffiehbs05: How many are there? My name is pretty unique. 10:31:09 AM CilantroFP: muffie from dealbreaker who bess keeps pointing me to whenever i bug her about reviewing my book 10:31:33 AM muffiehbs05: You want me to review your book? 10:31:37 AM CilantroFP: yes! 10:31:51 AM muffiehbs05: Well, I donât write for DB anymore, after I had to leave The Bank. 10:32:01 AM CilantroFP: ah that sux iâm sorry 10:32:07 AM CilantroFP: well review it on your site and iâll link 10:32:15 AM muffiehbs05: But Iâve got about 7500 daily viewers. 10:32:33 AM CilantroFP: niiiiice 10:32:52 AM CilantroFP: maybe u can have a contest and iâll ship your reader 2-3 free books 10:33:17 AM muffiehbs05: So, look, not that I donât want to become a publicity outlet for your book and anything, Iâm sure thatâs helpful, but I really wanted to try and learn about strategy for my fund, you know. Maybe you could actually do something for me considering all the things you want me to do for you? 10:33:41 AM CilantroFP: haha ok definitely 10:33:44 AM CilantroFP: what kind of fund 10:33:55 AM muffiehbs05: Well, I donât know yet. 10:34:06 AM muffiehbs05: I have capital already. 10:34:23 AM CilantroFP: cool, better than i ever did! 10:34:47 AM CilantroFP: well whats your strategy/goals/experience 10:34:55 AM muffiehbs05: Well see, Iâm not totally sure yet. 10:35:05 AM muffiehbs05: Goals, make good returns, duh. 10:35:29 AM muffiehbs05: Experience, several years at The Bank. HBS. Vassar. 10:36:04 AM CilantroFP: gotcha that all means nothing to meâthat sounds like youâre all traditional investment banking doing deals and taking fees 10:36:10 AM CilantroFP: iâm just a trader without any connections 10:36:34 AM muffiehbs05: Traditional investment banking deals? Do you think I work for Bank of America or something? 10:37:41 AM muffiehbs05: Iâm trying to learn how to make money. I have capital already. I thought you were kind of the grass-roots, everymanâs hedge fund guy? 10:38:15 AM CilantroFP: yah i can teach u trading 10:38:19 AM CilantroFP: if thats what u want to do 10:38:20 AM muffiehbs05: You can? 10:38:29 AM CilantroFP: yeah thats what i do, teach others to be better than me 10:38:30 AM muffiehbs05: Well, donât you have to trade to have a hedge fund? 10:39:22 AM CilantroFP: nah theres all k ind of hedge funds and strategies 10:40:04 AM muffiehbs05: Like what? 10:41:04 AM CilantroFP: private equity, macro, currencies, commodities, a million diff markets 10:41:10 AM CilantroFP: i trade us smallcaps 10:41:12 AM CilantroFP: not very scalable 10:41:17 AM CilantroFP: but u can make a few mil/year 10:41:21 AM muffiehbs05: What are Diff Markets? 10:41:29 AM CilantroFP: different markets 10:41:32 AM muffiehbs05: Ah! 10:41:42 AM muffiehbs05: Well, so how much capital is good to start with? 10:41:52 AM CilantroFP: depends on your strategy and risk tolerance 10:42:07 AM CilantroFP: for mine u only need a few thusand 10:42:12 AM CilantroFP: aka why i went the mainstream route 10:42:15 AM muffiehbs05: But I have a lot more than that. 10:42:26 AM muffiehbs05: So do I need a different strategy? 10:42:46 AM CilantroFP: correct, mym strategy only works up to $10mil or so 10:43:02 AM muffiehbs05: Really? 10:43:18 AM muffiehbs05: So if I had, $5 millionâ¦ it would still work? 10:43:36 AM CilantroFP: sure 10:43:40 AM CilantroFP: its actually perfect for that 10:43:48 AM CilantroFP: iâm just too excitable and undisciplined 10:44:03 AM muffiehbs05: Me too! 10:44:14 AM CilantroFP: bess was right, weâll get along just fine 10:44:23 AM muffiehbs05: Hah! 10:45:01 AM muffiehbs05: My investors have a high risk tolerance. They really donât care if I lose a lot of money. 10:45:17 AM CilantroFP: cool, welcome to my life then 10:45:30 AM muffiehbs05: Yeah? 10:45:53 AM muffiehbs05: Where did you get your MBA? 10:46:55 AM CilantroFP: ha i was a philosophy major at tulane! 10:47:01 AM CilantroFP: none of that ivy shit 10:47:07 AM muffiehbs05: No MBA? 10:47:39 AM CilantroFP: nah i was too busy making my 2nd million 10:47:53 AM muffiehbs05: Oh. Well what investment bank did you work at? 10:48:26 AM CilantroFP: http://timothysykes.com/index.php/books/library.html 10:48:28 AM CilantroFP: this is all i know 10:48:33 AM CilantroFP: no corporate experience whatsoever 10:48:42 AM muffiehbs05: You didnât work at an investment bank? 10:48:43 AM CilantroFP: learned everything through trial and error and reading 10:48:54 AM CilantroFP: haha no, i started in high school 10:49:11 AM muffiehbs05: Wait, your book was TRUE? 10:49:15 AM muffiehbs05: I thought it was ficiton? 10:49:20 AM CilantroFP: nooooooooooooo 10:49:22 AM CilantroFP: it was 100% true 10:49:24 AM CilantroFP: lol 10:49:29 AM muffiehbs05: You know like Catcher in the Wheat or whateverâ¦ 10:49:49 AM CilantroFP: LOL, thats funny 10:49:56 AM muffiehbs05: What? 10:50:04 AM CilantroFP: that u thought it was fiction 10:50:17 AM muffiehbs05: So, wait, you didnât get an MBA or work at an investment bank? 10:50:32 AM CilantroFP: nope 10:50:40 AM CilantroFP: always just worked from my dorm room/bedroom 10:50:48 AM muffiehbs05: Uh, ok. 10:50:55 AM muffiehbs05: Yeah. So, I have to run. Talk to you later. 10:51:56 AM CilantroFP: cya Not funny, Bess.