Dear friends, it is my pleasure to introduce to you today the released version of the trading system posted here earlier in beta testing as MonkeyTrader. We have granted exclusive rights for its use and marketing to the proprietary trading firm Schwerpunkt und Mannbrechen, LLP, affectionately known in the trade as S&M. They will offer it solely to EliteTrader registered members in good standing (lurkers need not apply) under the trade name ETrader. With reference to the attached screen shot, I invite the founder and a principal of S&M Trading, Herr Mannbrecher, to demonstrate the system with the assistance of his lovely intern, Fraulein Grossenbrusten. I don't mind saying that I am very fond of Manny, as his friends call him, because his forceful personality brings back fond memories of my days in the Hitler Jugenden when I happily observed my father rehabilitating misguided members of the resistance. Manny, like my father, specializes in the application of rapid Pavlovian conditioning, in this case to trading training. Manny, over to you! Zank you, Herr Doktor Mudgins. May I call you Duref? Of course I can! Fraulein Grossenbrusten, haff you inserted ze remote control conditioning device into your little muschi? Ja? Fabelhaft! Now here is vat ve do. You vill look at ze chart and for each bar you vill giff me an interpretazionen of sieben key conditions in ze followink order: 1) iss zere sufficient oder insuffisant volume to trade? 2) Iss ze trend up, down or sidevays? 3) Iss ze mechanical zystem calling for a long, a kurz, or to stay flat? (Ja, ja, ich weiss, Fraulein Grossenbrusten, you vill never be flat!) 4) Iss ze current bar strongly or weakly rot, grun, oder blau? 5) Hass ze bar just completed, started, or about to start ein test of one or more of unser proprietary indicators? 6) Iss zere a two-bar reversal signal showink? 7) Und most important, what trade action would you take at ze ent of ziss bar? (As an aside to zose in ze know on ET, ziss iss no mehr to ask zan ze trading wizard Jack Hershey asks of hiss disciples: sieben bits of data scannt over und over.) Before wir beginnen, would you like a demonstration of ze training device? Ja? Here goess! (She screams piercingly!) Fun, ja? Now, now, meine liebchen, it iss all for a gut cause! No pain, no gain. You VILL learn to follow ze system schnell!Wir haben kein geld to waste on fools!