So to keep the updates : it seems that the problem is on its way of being fully sorted. The target was of 200%, well above the habitual 30% test; reached 78% and managed to actually get the profits ( not a lot) into cash in the bank. And I have started the exercices on trading profits. It is actually a strange thing to hold the notes in the hands, instead of just seeing it as a number. Now, I think I can also bring a new issue to the coach. Made a near 'perfect' trade - aka ride a pairs down to its bottom, exited at the right moment, reversed and ride it up and exited at the right moment. the only thing when I exited the trade, the first thought that came to my mind was "The dax really killed me on this day". May be I have still not digested my 6-figure trade loss of few years ago. The hurt just feels as if the mega loss was still fresh.
I am really understanding why the future champions - aka the kids that start training in some world known champion stadiums- have coaches ( not just technical sport coaches). had I known, in trading, I'd have started with investing serious and copious time into psychology. I was informed about the importance of psychology at the time, and I still believed the prop firms were wasting their money having a fomer "sport performance" coach on their payroll. Talk about real arrogance masked as stupidity. Who were these world champions psy coaches?
Back to the drawing board. This thread is keeping me honest. Up around 11k, did not cash it. Saw the profits accumulated via strict discipline, got excited, started to overleverage again ( here more like superleverage as at some points I was at 450euros/pip, when my max is 30eur/pip max). Possible reasons: * long time I have done low 5 figure in a day. So may be this overwhelmed me and I got super-excited, as I could not help remembering when I used to, during my "naive trader days", just go daily to the bank to take 10k trading profits in cash. * I completely lost focus. I was well above the day objectives, so I should have stopped, cashed in, and moved on. Though the trade was correct, my position size meant I got taken out with the normal instrument noise. Obviously risk was completely out of my mind.
As I am back to the drawing board. I can really say that every appraoch is being looked at . Now, I am all about to make sure that I : -do my 5 hours daily meditation. It seems that no matter what, I'll have to organize my days so as to ensure at least 2hrs of meditation before sleep. My max in one go being 3 and half hours waking up in the morning. I actually did not clock in my daily 5 hours, as I skipped one or two hours in the evening. That is something to keep an eye on. The meditation regime is very useful in getting to clarify the types of issues that are coming up: we've got to zoom in the overwhelmed, and the super-excitement feelings I've identified. -daily preayers to remove the feelings of triumphalism , remove the feelings of superiority, and enhance the feelings of humility; as trading success seem to develop excessive confidence, strong feelings of superiority, arrogance, pride, and after a good analysis a kind of self-idolatry, and actual idolatry when the only praise if due to the God of real Catholics - Truth and Purity - ( not to be confused with the God of fornicators, the God of manipulators, the God of masters of deception and lies, etc). I have quiet a few theology books to read on these subjects. The interesting thing, is I have confidance that the problem will be sorted. What I'd like is to have a sense of detachement regarding profit amounts. I'd like to have zero feelings no matter the profit size. I proposed to the coach to limit the profit sizes so as to build accoutumance to given amounts, and the answer was no, but to just trade, and stick to the 5 hours daily meditation and noticing what issues are revealed via the meditation.
Very hard work. No course to offer :just open a psychology thread, and describe in detail your experience. If I can add my opinion, I will.
I have to say, I have been sooooo busy with all the training, coaching, trading that I had completely forgotten about "pas de souci". Working on self-sabotage is very hard work and time consuming. That's why I have not posted about : I really had completely forgotten about that. I assume that must be why "pas de souci" is doing 'its' best to attract attention: I heard that now, there are suggestions "pas de souci" is into blowing up Universities?????? Seruously????? I mean, one can be angry against educated people, but to go and think about blowing up some uni???? * * * I M P O R T A N T **** I suposed you want to know if they are going to blow up a university? The good news may be is that they might have decided not to blow up a kid school: getting teachers to be aware of school safety does help. Now, blowing up a University? Would not that be a first in a Western country? They'd be the people to go to for any "terror" against any government. There are school, uni shootings, but never heard of universities being blown up. If that was to happen, just thank whoever ( individual or group) directs, or manages the people that use the verbal code "pas de souci" to recognise their group appartenance. Those are the people responsible for such a thing, if they were to occur, as they are linked. To find out what is really going on, you need to get whoever directs, or manages the people that use the verbal code "pas de souci" to announce that someone has been "infiltrated/recruted (?)" successfully. Get these people to list the students and the teachers they have approached and, if possible successfully recruted, as well as the places they have then managed to infiltrate. And the methods used, so that other "duped" can be discovered. Around these "approached" and "recruited" people, you'll find out who is organizing the stuff againt the university, that is putting all the people there on alert. What I understand, is that the group "pas de souci" is about people who are into manipulation on one side ( to ensure anonymity, thus impunity) , and on the other side are into violence, and who have found that blowing up places and people is something that benefit them, especially as with a motto of anonymity, they get impunity with it. what can help find out which university MIGHT get blown up: 1) the governement building where the mgen is : this government building also had its security "lifted" unofficially. One clue : Check november and october month camera at the entrance, where visitors ID were no longer registered, when the building was still under government decision to have tight security measures in place. the same happened for the university: its security got "lifted" unofficially around the same time. Check from cameras; from the date, security staff no longer checked people at lunch time. That should have started around october. How was this done ? was an impersonator used so as to get security measures lifted? Were camera or audio then planted? I absolutely have no idea. What information they'd be seeking, for what purpose ? no idea. Only "pas de souci" knows. 2) the mgen staff : I heard at least two staff had been approached. One is fully "recruted". The other, I do not know. There again, that's the work of "pas de souci". 3) do assume that none of the students, may be few of the teachers are going to talk. Nobody will acknowledge they got duped, that's for sure. Ego, ego and ego! Just in my group, 6 to 8 female one have been successfully approached. 5 for sure are fully "controlled" : one trio was the earliest one to fall, in less than 2 months. I don't know if they have been now turned into "recruting agent" as they seem bent on trying to recruit one student, who seems very recalcitrant. "pas de souci" should be able to provide who got approached and recruited. 4) in the first school, the male student was also "controlled". One female teacher he was close to , at least at the start, is for sure fully "controlled". The director was approached, and used at some stage to infiltrate "higher up" - the inspector. And then the inspector was also used to infiltrate "higher up". I don't know if this "higher up" has a clue, or if she is going to be used to get them to infiltrate "higher up". in the second school, one female teacher was approached. in the third school, two teachers have been approached but because, I think, they are extremely careful or very busy, they failed to be "recruited". The director has been approached successfully, and MIGHT have been "recruited", but it is not clear. At least two female teachers were approached and recruted. in the fourth school ( the kindergarten one), the director was "approached". She might be now "controlled". One short temporary teacher was "approached". Here again "pas de souci" is/are the person/people to go to. Now, it could be that "pas de souci" has lost control of the situation: - infiltration methods get learned - manipulation methods get learned - the art of deception and lying get learned - methods of impersonation get learned - sosie techniques get learned - illegally stalking methods get learned - phone impersonation methods get learned - mobile phone hacking techniques get learned - computer hacking technique get learned But here again, only "pas de souci" knows who they showed these methods to. Then if you can get the people who learned these methods to list who could have learned it from them, then continuing, you will manage to get whatever you are seeking. You MIGHT not accept it, but real Catholicism is important to get the full truth : people lie, hide, omit important 'details' for many reasons. As long as they do not come to a place where they prefer purity to anything else, just assume that they can still omit important 'details'. One Lady needed 2 years of continuous confessing/Bible Study/Religious study to confess the 'detail'. She was luckily forgiven, and, chose to be a very productive person. One method that works very well: dhamma (dot) org, as people discover how to move forward with whatever background they have. Basically: people believe that their past determines their future, when the truth is , after a LOT of sprituality/mindset/psychological work, any future they can make for themselves.
Nowdays, the easiest and safest way is via private detective that are fully vetted and fully informed about the methods ( stalking, taking people's pics via mobile and immediately passing these and the location to their network, then female honeytrap, planting electronic monitoring devices etc.), the safest way is to go via these private detectives. They are always straightforward: they always present their Id, their purpose and then arrange for a meeting in their office. That's the way they work. There is no confusion, no chance of stalking. Anything else, leaves the door open to a stalker to scan the environment, take pics and send the pics with location to their 'network' , and before you know it, a ' criminally linked network' is working on the target.
Day trading appears deceptively easy in hindsight. It’s much harder on the moving right edge of the chart. You need a method that has a positive expectancy for the specific market you trade (based on backtesting) and the mental fortitude to trade it with discipline. Most traders think they have this but don’t.