the ant and the grasshopper

Discussion in 'Politics & Religion' started by Gordon Gekko, Aug 27, 2002.

  1. The original version of the ant and the grasshopper:

    The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.


    The modern version:

    The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.


    CBS, PBS, CNN, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so? Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
    cries when they sing, "It's Not Easy Being Green."

    Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house, where the news stations film the group singing, "We shall overcome." Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.

    Al Gore exclaims, in an interview with Peter Jennings, that the ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."

    Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act," retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government. Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients. The ant loses the case.

    The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.

    The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident, and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

  2. Hehe, nice story. Did you write that yourself?
  3. rs7


    Now THAT is FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!
  4. no, i didn't..i don't know who did. i added the pictures though! :)
  5. that's the best thing I've seen on this site in a while, and totally true.
  6. Josh_B


    lol good one.

    It may be the truth, regardless who's in office. Different names same agenda.

    The main slogan for gov/IRS

    we got what it takes to take what you got

    or does this also belong to the: top 10 BS lines at Pro Firms?

    just kidding

  7. one of the reasons i agree with that story so much is this:

    my sister has a kid, doesn't work, and basically gets health and dental insurance for free. i'm more responsible and realize i can not afford to have kids right i don't have any kids. where's my health and dental insurance? i currently have neither as i sit here with a terrible fuck!ng cold and i haven't been to a dentist in freaking years. irresponsibility should not be rewarded.

    in 1999 or 2000, i forget which... i paid $36,000+ in taxes. a lot of the money was made during the end of the bull market. it was basically a one time fluke rise in my income. it's not like i make that much every year (hehe not yet anyway). but anyways, i got taxed like i make that every year. i don't even own a fuck!ng home and i got taxed over $36,000 under age 25! what a fuck!ng rip off!

    i believe our health insurance system should be one of these 2 ways:

    either nobody gets it unless they can pay for it on their own (which will never happen).

    or we all get it, and if you're rich enough to pay for your own kind of insurance, you can get a rebate or something.

    i haven't thought about this too much, but somethin ain't right...

    in a few years when i'm raking in the money from the stock market, i'm gonna be laughing all the way to the bank. i'll be thinking, i'm glad to be taking your money fools, you took mine. thanks for pissing me off and giving me drive.
  8. Sounds a bit like "Bug's Life." Only the ants revolted.

  9. :D
  10. If I had a million dollars, I'd help out some people -- what's so wrong with that??
    #10     Nov 11, 2002