Did any contract killers threaten family and friend so as to obtain self-deriding and self-degrading statements and arrangements ? WHO hired the contract killers? and WHY ? ... wow! she must have been scarred as hell!
yup! I've just finished some studies on vanity, arrogance and meprisant. Well everybody has to face their faults . Some people have complained a LOT about my "arrogance". I feel like laughing, as I really do not see anything wrong with praising good results. First it seemed it came from the ultra-competitive environment I was in from age 6 till 18. So 12 years where "arrogance" was actually pushed forward and rewarded - from systematically getting "bonuses" etc... Also, we were inculcated fom age 6 we were the best ( just one could pretend to be better than us) in the whole country. Then within this environment, I was in what we called the best of the best. From age 6 to 18, I only saw myself as my pal as the best of the best. It felt natural. Even now it feels natural to always be the best. Actually one favorite is "simply the best"!LOL. Funny the psychology. <iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/vwGWOAbpBdk?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> So actually, I was programmed/conditionned to chose the favorite song "simply the best" : that's great.
The arrogance from my point of view does not seem a problem at all. But now, I am starting to understand why after high school, those coming from our environment were strongly encouraged to do as plenty as volunteering as possible - from helping other students, to contributing to as many menial activities as possible, and being completely fine with that - always doing it in the BEST way as possible! LOL
Now within this environment "arrogance" was not a problem as we all aimed to be the one to be there, so there was a very strong emulation to go forward. The only people who would complain about "arrogance" were the one who would be fired at the end of the year ( the 10% bottom were always to be fired). In fact it was alwys about praising the effort first, as the more efforts, the better results.
Now regarding KING CRIMSON : the arrogance could effectively show by a silence with raised nake coupled with deep up breathing, specially as a good profit was showing up. Quiet amazing really. So it was not actually directed at him : it was my own trading. Then in my journaling, I have to be honest it is like "Dieudonne" - maximum bitching on any observation with no restreint. Now who opened a PRIVATE journal? Now the PRIVATE journal bitching : it is a private journal, so that I bitch praise , criticism, moqueries, it is a good way to look to different aspects of a subject. May be there should have been a praise aspect : He had the COURAGE to manage to align 2 sentences without blushing like most of the pals! LOL. I must really be "intimidating". Still are actually : as the "cuisante" experience of a pal who I "unsettled" at an event. I also now remember of one pal, who could not pronounce a word and then after a deep breath managed to align 3 words. Quiet amazing that I did not notice that.
Now, thinking of it, I can understand why even if I did not pronounce a word, King Crimson could deeply hurt by my silent arrogance : it was the body language of arrogance , that get communicated more quickly as it was direct communication on emotional level. This is why French people are known to have a " je ne sais quoi" that really can make one feel the extreme feeling of arrogance through a deep sense of "feeling of inferiority". I think there was one English lad who said French arrogance was so "unsufferable" that he had to stop the meeting, as half the room was getting enraged! LOL! At the time, I really did not understand what the problem was. hahahahahahaha. And it was another person who was "exciting" the room. So if two arrogant people were to have had this same level of arrogance, I believe they would have seen it as a way of acknowledging that the other person was worth "competing" with. Now in the case of King Crimson, it must have been a total surprised and shock to have this deep emotion of "superiority" being received from someone else. In his case, it awakened the feeling a "inferiority" instead of the feeling of "desiring to improve". I suppose this is why it never occured that there was any arrogance problem, because at fist sight - except on the skin issues- King Crimson could hide very well the inferiority complex. Lately, as he must have read a lot more about the source of his "explosive" temper, he actually changed a bit the way he avoid the painful emotion of "shame" and "humiliation" by using DENIAL . He did not use the expected conditionning that would be "attack". "I was just looking for a piece of ass" (sic) BUT it should have been "I still want to avoid feeling these emotions of shame , thus humiliation" as it becomes a little shaming that everybody knows what methods - putting a hidden camera in a bathroom via removal staff company ! lol. So yes there was thus some shame in his acquiring photos via cameras. But also a denial mechanism to deal with the slight shame, more as a little feeling of embarrassment.
getting some indigestion issues with my lunch of chicken kiev pasta, so I might as well stop, and get a rest with this beautiful weather.
I am really agreably surprised of how I understand psychology much better. Not as well as a real pro, but much much better! Time to go now.
wow really long trading day - starting thursday till next day. Now really time to unwind. Really nice weather here, pure with low pollution. Very much appreciated.