Senator Hillary Clinton's endearing qualities

Discussion in 'Politics & Religion' started by ak15, Jun 1, 2008.

  1. ak15


    A satirical commentary which is hilarious to say the least:

    The following is a message from the next president of the United States - Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton:

    Good evening my fellow Americans. As we all know this has already been a long hard fought campaign for the democratic presidential nomination. But tonight with my recent victory in Indiana and Senator Obama's in North Carolina, we remain exactly where we were four months ago - hopelessly deadlocked. Therefore this nomination is going to be decided as it should be by the super delegates based not on primary results or causes or delegate counts or popular vote but on their sober assessment of which candiate will be the strongest against McCain in November. Tonight I'm here to tell you why I'm that candidate.

    First, I am a sore loser. If and when I am the nominee, I know as do the super delegates that Senator Obama will work his heart out for my election. If on the other hand Senator Obama is chosen, I will probably refuse to campaign for him or if I do so it will be in a resentful halfhearted way thus ensuring his defeat so that I can run again in 2012. You see unlike my opponent I am just not going to lose gracefully. It is not a criticism of Senator Obama, it is just a fact.

    Second, my supporters are racist. If and when I am the nominee Senator Obama's African supporters will be disappointed perhaps but they will still rally to me. If however Senator Obama is the nominee, my supporters will refuse to vote for him - partly because I will secretly tell them not to but mainly because they are racially biased and would never vote for any African American candidate. I am not bragging, that is just the way it is. Now to those of you that worry if my oppponent is denied the nomination that African Americans might simply stay home, I remind you:

    a) Until Senator Obama shockingly and might I add rudely and selfishly won the Iowa causes, most African Americans supported me.

    b) My husband was the first black president and

    c) In the days ahead we expect to receive the endorsement of Ameica's pre-eminent African American leader - Reverend Jeremiah wright - which brings me to my third and final argument:

    Unlike Senator Obama, I have no ethical standards. Even my critics would agree that once I get the nomination I will stop at nothing - absolutely nothing to win - whereas with Senator Obama, there are some things he simply will not do. Take for example the race card which he has been reluctant to play as in "Anyone who doesn't vote for me is a racist". I on the other hand will be happy to play the gender card and claim that anyone who doesn't vote for me is a sexist. In fact, once Senator Obama is out of the picture, I look forward to playing the race card myself as in "Anyone who doesn't vote for me is both a sexist and a racist". Now to those of you who say - she'll never do that; it doesn't even make sense - I answer "If you believe that then you don't know me.

    So there you have it. Sore loser, racist supporters, no ethical standards - qualities Senator Obama simply cannot match. That is not an attack on my opponent. It is just the truth. When you consider that, the choice is obvious. Thank you.
  2. Why don't you list the source?

  3. ak15


    No need for me to list the source.