As relates to the need for Social Belonging... What Happens When Marriage, Family, and Community Are Subverted? America Has a Loneliness Epidemic and Its Teenagers Are in a Severe Mental Health Crisis by R Albert Mohler, Jr. Several headline stories tell us that American adolescents, indeed Americans in general, even American children, are suffering from mental illness and anxiety at record rates. The New York Times this past Sunday ran not one, but two major stories. One was on the front page, the headline, "It's Life or Death, U.S. Teenagers Face a Mental Health Crisis." Inside the same newspaper, as if the other article hadn't even run, there was a major article. The headline, "The City has a Loneliness Problem." Then, just days before the Wall Street Journal had announced that children as young as age eight should now be screened for anxiety because the mental illness, the stress, the anxiety problem has now been downshifted to the very young, even to elementary school. The front page article on teenagers was by Matt Richtel, and he summarized it this way, "American adolescence is undergoing a drastic change. Three decades ago, the gravest public health threats to teenagers in the United States came from binge drinking, drunken driving, teenage pregnancy, and smoking. These have since fallen sharply replaced by a new public health concern, soaring rates of mental health disorders." The article then goes on to document what it declares to be the soaring rates of mental health disorders. And it ties at least the most immediate months of the crisis to COVID-19 to teenagers being not in school, to adolescents being under stress, as well as their parents and families. But you're also looking at the fact that the article documents what mental health observers have indicated as a very long term trend, a very troubling trend. And it is described as a decline in mental health among American teenagers, intensified by the COVID pandemic, but predating it. We're also told that the problem spans racial and ethnic socioeconomic divides. It is becoming a widespread problem. So much so that it is now burdening the entire mental health professional class and it's also alarming many who are involved, especially in education, watching what is going on with American adolescents. But the article is very pathological. It acts as if this is something that has just happened. Perhaps this stress on American teenagers, this new mental health crisis among adolescents, is something that's just an artifact of the modern age. But here we need to step back and Christians need to think very, very carefully. The assumption in this article is that something horrible has gone wrong in the lives of many teenagers. Their emotional state, their psychological health, even their psychiatric wellbeing is now being threatened by all kinds of forces without and within. To the credit of the New York Times, there are some factors that are identified here. Social media, bullying online, the loss of all kinds of social engagement, especially in recent months during the COVID-19 pandemic. But the big point of this article seems to be that there's a problem and the problem is basically something that has surprised most adults in authority. We're also told that social media certainly contributes to the problem, but it isn't the problem. As the article tells us, the crisis is often attributed to the rise of social media, but solid data on the issue is limited. The findings are nuanced and often contradictory and some adolescents appear to be more vulnerable than others to the effects of screen time. We're told that teenagers are getting less and less sleep. They're getting less and less exercise. Maybe there are physiological factors involved here. All in a period of life which is absolutely crucial. Then you have major questions such as this one raised in the article, "This surge has raised vexing questions. Are these issues inherent to adolescents that merely went unrecognized before, or are they being now overdiagnosed?" Now, here's where I want to step back and say that as Christians look at this, we recognize there really is something going on here. And as we're going to be looking at the problem of loneliness, New York City is the subject of this article, an epidemic of loneliness there. And as you're looking at anxiety disorders, we are now told threatening even elementary school-aged children, something has gone wrong. It's incredibly telling as we look at this article that the secular worldview assumes that whatever has gone wrong must be something in society, must be something like not only the pandemic and social media, but there must be other deep problems. Or maybe, as I just read from the article, these problems have been there all along and they just weren't recognized. Well, just thinking first about adolescence, it's always been a period of stress. It's always been a period of self-exploration and there have always been particular vulnerabilities, psychologically, emotionally and spiritually, during the period of life we know as adolescence. But this is where Christians need to lean into this kind of news and say, it's insane to question whether or not American adolescents, or for that matter, adolescents throughout human history, should be assumed to have as a normal fact of life all of these psychiatric, psychological, emotional, all these kinds of problems that are detailed in this article. If adolescence has become this dangerous, how is it that any humans emerged healthily into adulthood? But this is where Christians need to bring some honesty to the conversation and also some very good biblical theology, some key insights from the Christian worldview. Insights that any successful civilization, by the way, had better find at least in some form. Perhaps for Christians, we should look at this modern moment, this modern age, and recognize what is missing in the lives of so many young people, particularly in this case, adolescents. What is missing in so many lives is the stability of the family that God had intended from the beginning. What would we expect if we look at the brokenness that is now written large across so much of American family life? The biblical worldview tells us that human health and human flourishing take place most effectively, most abundantly, within the context of the goodness of God's creation and the structures of creation that God has given us. At the very center of that is the gift of marriage. And the subversion of marriage in the modern age, the translation of marriage from being a monogamous exclusive union of a man and a woman to being a vast social experiment, which has now been redefined, not only in duration, that is just so long as two people might want to be married, but also redefined in its essence. It is no longer, according to the Supreme Court of the United States, the union of a man and a woman. It can now be a man and a man, a woman and a woman, and of course, we're just bracing ourselves for what is going to follow. We have subverted marriage. And once you subvert marriage, you start to subvert the family. And as you weaken the family, one of the things we need to think about is the dramatic falling birth rate in the United States, and in so much of the world today, particularly in the most economically advanced nations. There's a formula, a pattern we can see at work here. The more economically healthy, the more economically advanced a society becomes, certainly you might say the more wealthy it becomes, the fewer children marriages tend to produce. And that means you have smaller families and that follows the fact that you have so many fractured families or temporary families or weakened families. And then you consider adolescents and they're living in a world in which the very structures that God had given us in order to protect children at young ages, yes, and through adolescence. They have been subverted. They have been weakened. They have been undermined by a society that so valorizes and worships individual personal autonomy, that it would be considered rude to raise these issues as contributing factors to what is now, we are told, an epidemic of mental illness, anxiety, psychological problems among young Americans, particularly teenagers and adolescents. But remember that Wall Street Journal article suggesting that there are authorities now stating that children of elementary school age should be routinely tested for anxiety because anxiety disorders are now increasingly found even among those who are as young as eight. Reporter Brianna Abbott of the Wall Street Journal is citing what's identified as draft guidance from the U.S. Preventative Services Task Force. We're told that that group "has made a recommendation on screening children and adolescents for anxiety. The task force, a panel of independent volunteer experts that makes recommendations on matters such as screening for diabetes and cancer, also reiterated its 2016 guidance that children between ages 12 and 18 years old should be screened for major depressive disorder." Again, remember the headline is that anxiety screening is not worse for children as young as eight. The question should obviously fall to any intellectually honest person. What has gone wrong in our society that these kinds of headlines would make sense? It is an unfolding tragedy. But we should understand that there is no therapeutic response that is going to be adequate when the structures of creation are undermined. If you really back off of the family, if you subvert marriage, if you suggest that we're just autonomous individuals living in some kind of accidental community, if any arrangement will do as well as any other, if children don't need two parents in the home, and for that matter, the radical decrease in the number of siblings and also the lack of exposure to extended family means that children are increasingly alone. And here's something the Bible tells us very clearly. It is not good for us to be alone. There in Genesis 2, God makes that declaration about Adam. But of course, it's an explanation, it's a declaration about humanity. And God's answer most fundamentally to that need is marriage, and out of marriage coming children, then the family, and out of extended family coming larger kinship structures, larger structures of support, and eventually neighborhoods and communities. That takes us to that second report that came in the very same Sunday edition of the New York Times. It's about an epidemic of loneliness in one of the biggest cities of the world. We're talking, of course, about New York City itself. As I said, this article bears the headline, "The City Has a Loneliness Problem." John Leland's the reporter. And this is what he tells us, by the way. Just listen to his setup of the problem. It's all about evolution, we're told. Leland writes, "The human brain, having evolved to make people seek safety in numbers, registers loneliness as a threat. He says that centers in the brain go into overdrive, triggering a release of fight or flight stress hormones. Your heart rate rises, your blood pressure and sugar level increases to provide energy in case you need it. Your body produces extra inflammatory cells to repair tissue damage and prevent infection and fewer antibodies to fight viruses. Subconsciously, you start to view other people more as potential threats, sources of rejection or apathy, and less as friends." So at one in the same time, this article tells us that loneliness is now of epidemic proportions in New York City, but don't blame New York City, don't blame people, blame evolution. It's evolution that has misdirected our entire brain and physiological system to assume that being alone is a threat. Let's just back off for a moment. Let's just go back to Genesis 2. Genesis 2 tells us that it is our creator who declared it is not good that we should be alone. Have you wondered how to define loneliness? Well, the New York Times will define it for you, "Loneliness as defined by mental health professionals is a gap between the level of connectedness that you want and what you have." We're told, "It is not the same as social isolation, which is codified in the social sciences as a measure of a person's contacts. Loneliness," we are told, "is a subjective feeling. People can have a lot of contacts and still be lonely or be perfectly content by themselves." Just remember that the article began by saying that evolution has sort of tricked us into thinking that being alone is a problem. But again, the Bible tells us that our Creator tells us that loneliness is a problem. So we look at this and we recognize there's an incredible, massive, secular evasion of the reality that the very structures of creation that God gave us to keep us from being lonely, the structures that lead to human happiness, human flourishing, let's just mention human reproduction and the raising of children, when you break those down, there are consequences, moral consequences. There are also, it turns out, therapeutic, psychological, psychiatric consequences. And these articles tell us that, as you look at many cities, you're looking at a concentration of that loneliness and of these problems. And perhaps more tragically as you're looking at younger Americans, even teenagers and children, you're looking at the downloading and the down shifting of that kind of anxiety. And it is adults who bear the blame. And we'd simply have to go back and understand that a society that has been breaking down everything that would make us healthy is a society that breeds unhealth. It's also very telling that the article about the epidemic of psychological problems and emotional problems among American adolescents also goes to the fact that a part of the stress is an identity crisis. Now, in one sense, that's always been true the who am I question of adolescence. But this article, even though it is unintentionally doing so, points to the arrival of all the LGBTQ sexuality and gender questions as now pressing upon young people identity questions that the modern age says are inevitable, but we, as Christians, understand should never have been raised in the first place. What would we expect other than when we look to young people and say, you're going to have to figure everything out for yourself, including your gender identity, your place and role in society, who you want to be, for how long you want to be that, or you could be someone else. We are creating the problem. And then we pathologize it, we label it, and then we answer it with what is supposed to be a therapeutic answer, and then we appear to be surprised when that breeds only more problems. At one point in this article, it is said that teenagers are suffering from a cognitive implosion. That is simply too much pressure on having to think through too many issues. Just about everyone I know can feel at times like we are experiencing a cognitive implosion. But in this case, it is a pathology that we have brought upon ourselves and are now inflicting upon our own children. At the very least, Christians just have to understand that this points to the goodness of the family, to the goodness of marriage, to God's plan in that family being a safe haven, a haven in a heartless world, as it was put some decades ago. We come to understand that a biblical theology of family is then extended into a biblical theology of community. And that means neighborhood. It means organic community. It means town. It means having an identity with other families. A city that is made up or a community that is comprised of persons who have mutual obligations, as well as mutual conversations and personal interactions. When we create a society that tries to move all meaning online and tries to make human identity the most fundamental level just something we determine for ourselves. When we go so far as to argue that even loneliness is just a problem brought about by an accident of evolution, we are truly a pathological society. And for Christians, it just underlines the goodness of what God has given us in marriage and in the family. It should lead us to thank God and to cherish our marriages, our families, our extended families, our kinship structures. Yes, but also community. And for Christians, as we close on this today, it reminds us of the incredible goodness of the community that is the body of Christ. The church, as made evident in the full expression of the local church. We were made for family. We were made for community. And in Christ, we are made a part of Christ's family and the new community. If nothing else, all of this should make us as Christians more thankful and should press us on to be more faithful.
The problem with social belonging is that it creates the inevitable concept of comparison. The more people you socialize with, online or in person, the more people you end up comparing yourself to. The problem of course, and this is especially true for teenagers, is that comparing yourself to someone else is inevitably a joy killer, as you will always find admirable qualities in others that you don't possess (and may never be able to possess) yourself.
My Google search turned up a definition for Self-esteem as... confidence in one's own worth or abilities; self-respect. To remember the four concepts Chase lists under this category of human needs, I think... "Competence leads to confidence, and independence leads to freedom." As I write this, I'm thinking, it seems to me that even though our society today (in the USA at least) seems obsessed with helping people raise their self-esteem, it is failing miserably when you consider the percentage of people who lack confidence, independence and freedom. But then, my next thought is, "Yet, why should that be any surprise, since our culture is trying to build folk's self-esteem without developing their competence—and that just ain't gonna work!
As the definition for self-actualization, Google returns: the realization or fulfillment of one's talents and potentialities, especially considered as a drive or need present in everyone. Based simply on the words themselves, I figured self-actualization would entail "becoming who you really are" or who you were meant to be. What is it that makes you (or your life) matter? It's kind of like finding your place in the world. I used to tell students I "mentored" that life is all about making (good) choices, with the most important choice we will ever make being whether we will trust, believe and have faith in God. Later, I added that life is also all about (building strong, healthy) relationships, with the relationship that transcends or surpasses all others being the one we establish (or fail to establish) with our Creator. If it's true that life is all about relationships, it would make sense that at least half of the ways Chase suggests people can attain self-actualization is through certain relationships they have with significant others. However, I didn't bring the book with me to the main branch of the Long Beach Public Library, which is where I am right now, so let me see if I can remember the four things he listed under this category: Spouse or significant other Parenting Self-development Transcendence I'll check later and correct anything I got wrong. (I think transcendence had to do with spirituality in some way, but I will have to check on this as well.)
I think self-esteem and self-actualization are very related in the sense that they are both tied to one's "talents, abilities, or potentialities". So the real question is "What is an individual truly capable of developing in terms of skills and abilities?" I'm not sure there is a fixed limit to the number of skills and abilities that someone can accumulate over a lifetime if they have sufficient curiosity. I often find that the people who are the most depressed and uncertain about their lives are the ones who lack the skills to compete at a higher level. In fact, the most embarrassing question you can ask someone who is confused about his life moving forward is "What skills do you currently possess?". It's the most convicting question EVER because many people spend the majority of their spare time distracting themselves through media and games instead of focusing inward on the skills required to enhance their lives. But again, maybe that goes back to having an genetic disposition towards curiosity. If you're just not curious about learning new things, it seems that stagnation sets in and you're pretty much screwed from that point forward.
I'll have to try that out if the opportunity arises and see what happens. I'm almost inclined to share something similar I do as a teacher, but if I DO ever open a private school, it will be the key question I use to weed out candidates who are likely to present as behavior problems, so I think I'd better keep the question to myself for now, just in case.
HERE IS THE CORRECT LIST FOR SELF-ACTUALIZATION: Spouse or partner Parenting Self-development Goal-pursuits
Transcendence was the sixth and final category, all to itself. Chase says it was added to the hierarchy much later, and has to do with... A desire to leave an impact Legacy Spirituality Altruism
I was thinking that the six categories listed above constituted The Human Needs Map, but they don't. They are simply the six categories forming the hierarchy into which Abraham Maslow broke down human needs. The map Chase uses also lists six needs, but they are different. He separates them into two categories: the primary needs and the secondary needs, as follows... The Primary Needs: Significance Approval Acceptance The Secondary Needs: Intelligence Pity Strength I initially didn't recognize how Chase's book could do everything he said it could do, but now I'm beginning to get the picture. For instance, he lists outward indicators of each of the needs. So, if you are familiar with all the lists, and you see particular behaviors in an individual, you have a good idea as to what might be the underlying needs driving or motivating that person. Therefore, the next thing I'm planning to do is memorize these six lists. (Of course, this is from Chapter 9, so I still need to go back and see what information is in Chapters 1 through 8.)
To remember the six human needs, I'm using the acronyms "sappacc" (a nonsense word) and "sip." Significance Approval Acceptance Strength Intelligence Pity Chase says to "keep in mind that none of these needs indicate anything bad about anyone; we are all equally 'messed up' in our own way," and he goes on to use neutral or nonjudgmental language to describe them. However, for me to remember them, I'm going to have to use language that I personally find descriptive, and some of it is going to be anything but positive. I'll elaborate using Chase's words when I have more time, but for now, to remember the behavioral indicators of someone with Significance Needs, I'm going to define such a person as someone who is (1) a braggart; (2) a show-off; and/or (3) a maverick.