Plan going forward ... As I have now cleared my head, I plan to continue trading very small position size - 1 ES contract, this is 1.6 : 1 leverage. I hope that the light leverage will keep heat to a minimum, and I will get my brains and common sense back. The goal is to show consistent profitability (even small) and follow the rules. I will grade myself not on profits going forward, but on how I follow my own trading plan. If I follow my trading plan and there are no profits down the road, then the game is over. It means my past successes were due to pure luck and I really have no edge.
You're not easily discouraged are you? Most folks would throw in the towel after only losing half of their account in six months. OK, looking forward to you proving me wrong. I have no attachment to being right. Remind yourself before each trading session that you have the ability to do severe damage to your account. You've done it before. Don't take trades outside your plan. Taking trades outside your plan is like a marine going into a combat without a rifle. Your trading plan is your best friend. Without your plan you are worse than useless because you are a liability, an unmanaged risk, and an unlimited loss waiting to happen. Enough said. If you don't have religion by now, the market will be sure to give you a come-to-Jesus moment sooner or later. Good luck.