I read today elsewhere here the excellent advice to be your own guru. I have always believed this to be true in the vein of "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him!", but I had never tried it in practice. Until today: MeMe: Oh Great and Wondrous Guru! Will you teach me how to trade and grow rich? GuruMe: What's in it for me? MeMe: Why, you will have my undying gratitude, and I will suck up majorly along the way. GuruMe: I'd rather have your money. MeMe: I'll pay you after I get rich. GuruMe: No way. The other putzes I've mentored never paid enough attention to get rich. MeMe; Well, then, fuck you, you greedy unsharing bastard! GuruMe: Hey! You came to me. I didn't come to you!