Oh my god, I suck!

Discussion in 'Psychology' started by FireWalker, Mar 15, 2004.

  1. Wondering if anyone else has this problem and what they did about it.

    eg. Say I'm long with a small profit. I see a clear point to exit or even a clear reversal signal. But I ignore it and sit and hope. Sometimes I'll even say out loud "short signal here, resistance point here, if i was flat i would go short here." Even *physically* pointing out the clear downtrend on my screen. Yet my hands won't type the exit order. So I'll look for reasons to rationalize my hold even though I know I want to be short. Then I hold through some pain, and if price does go back up, I promise myself "This time when I see an exit/reversal signal, I'll take it". I'll even enter a limit order to exit at a good price and cancel it when price gets within a tick of it ("It's going to break through this time."). I won't exit a trade for the life of me (long or short, profitable or unprofitable).

    Any insights? This is ridiculous.
  2. Here's a thought.

    Your fundamental problem is Hope=Greed. You want to make more money on the trade.

    Think of it differently: I can make more money by reversing my position!!!!!!!!

    Try that!
  3. pspr


    You need to have a stern talk with yourself. If you do it again fire your ass and hire a new trader.
  4. abogdan


    First of all, there is nothing extraordinary in your experience, we all had it. So, relax take a deep breath and try the following:

    1. Set up a reward for your self like $1 or something.
    2. Everytime you follow your rules you pay your self a buck.
    3. Everytime you brake your rules deduct a buck.
    4. Pretend that you play for the max bucks in your pocket that you paid to yourself not for the money that you make in trading.

    I know it sounds stupid, I also thought its just a gimmick, but try it! It helped me and quite a few traders that I have shared this idea with.
  5. You know it's a problem so the next time you catch yourself being an idiot... just stop. Real easy, just trade out of it and solve your greed problem one trade at a time. Any profit is a good profit.

    The only one who can fix it is you. If it makes it easier to trade out next time, remember this:
    I GUARANTEE you will NEVER be consistently profitable until you can follow your strategy.
  6. It appears to me that you have no pre-defined exit point(s) when you enter these trades. Pick reasonable exit point(s) and at least partial out of your position at those point(s). This way you have locked in some profit or reduced your loss, while still allowing your "intuition" to keep you in the trade. If you cannot at least accomplish this, then I'm afraid you are in serious trouble.
  7. ramora


    Keep a count of every time you 'avoid the impulse to do something stupid'. Slowly you can see the number increase each day. Count the 'positives' instead of the 'negatives'...
  8. I should say, I've been in this hell for quite some time. Broke even trading NYSE for a year. Took a long break and started trading the ES recently and losing. But I think my losses are partially due to the difficulty of the ES. It's a beast. I want 6-10 pts, but it only gives up 2-3. And 2-3 isn't enough for me to hit the exit button.

    I'm getting some positive result out of this. Emotionally I mean. I'm doing it for a reason.

    Overconfidence, belief I'm right, better, etc. All BS of course and masking an underlying inferiority. Have to prove myself by hitting the daily range with a single trade, but underneath knowing that I'm not really good enough. "But I am good enough."

    F'n battle. I'm getting more out of the battle than I do the money. Why do I need this battle? To feel alive. Without this battle who am I?

    Did the same in school, in work, in everything. Bored so I create a challenge for myself. All A's in school is too easy. How little can I get away with and still pass? Very little. That gives me pride. I celebrate that. But the challenge is set up to always result in mediocrity. If someone puts me down, I fight back with fury, but if someone compliments or promotes me, I discount it and let myself fail. I breakeven.

    That's the result. The pattern. The underlying feelings are superiority/inferiority. Constantly comparing myself to imaginary people and creating imaginary situations to prove my superiority. Proof that ends up proving my inferiority. I prove that I'm brilliant by losing! That's the pattern. Is that deep enough? Or is there something before this?

    Why do I believe I'm superior?
    I was chosen. I'm special. I'm smarter. I'm different. The rules don't apply to me. I'm skilled at almost everything. I need noone.

    Why do I believe I'm inferior?
    I hate myself. I hate who I am. I'm worthless. I was a mistake/an accident. I shouldn't be here. I was an inconvenience to be discarded.

    Both of those are false. I know this. How do I communicate this to my emotional self who has known no other condition? That part of me must feel a sense of fear of losing its "self". Likely fighting for its own life wondering who I am without those beliefs.

    How do I change those beliefs?

    Well this helped. This explains why I sometimes feel good after I lose. Sometimes even celebrating in the glorious perfection of my losses. Half anguish, half glory. Anyone know a good psychologist? I'm sick of this crap.
  9. everybody gets what they want out of life. so maybe you want to fail because thats how it sounds to me. this is all mental so stop hoping and start trading. i also want to say this was a tough day so learn to cut down your volume that will help you make money on days like this.
  10. I go into all my trades thinking that I am wrong. This quickly gets me to find my exits. Every trade I enter, I tell myself, shit I got into this position by accident, by error! As soon as it goes down to my exit point, I immediately get out and tell myself, wow I just saved myself from a total disaster. Its this discipline that will keep us in the game...
    #10     Mar 15, 2004