New Wall Street Dictionary

Discussion in 'Wall St. News' started by joemiami, Oct 10, 2008.

  1. joemiami

    joemiami Guest

    I found this thru cnbc's FASTMONEY website... scroll down half the page and read the new terminology...... its pretty funny in a sad kinda way :D
  2. you lazy punk - paste a link!
  3. MTE


    Maybe it's not the one mentioned by the OP, but it's a good one.

    CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.

    CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

    BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

    BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

    VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

    P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

    BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

    STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

    STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

    STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

    FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

    MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

    CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

    YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

    WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

    INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

    PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.
  4. gucci


    LOL. Good one.:D I almost spit my coffee all over my laptop.