If nothing else, I take comfort in knowing you represent the opposing side of my opinion. Kind of gives me a warm feeling all over, you know? As an aside, I think you might find a receptive audience in Larry Craig for your timeless toilet humor. I hear he's also a pretty spiritual guy. You'd have a lot in common.
Based on past experience with you regularly pissing yourself in the chat room and here in the forum, I have zero doubt that you share the same "restless leg" syndrome that Craig hides from...