It's funny that you say that, because I've experienced the same exact situation for years. You're flattering yourself by saying that you are addicted to losing and that you lose because you enjoy hurting yourself. The truth is that you don't lose because you don't do what you know to work, but you lose because you don't know what works yet. The only psychological help you need is one that will make you realize that you do not know what works. It's really hard to realize that you do not have a profitable method. It took me 12 years of discretionary trading before realizing that I just didn't have a profitable method. Maybe it's so hard, because trading seems so easy that you just can't accept that you can't figure it out. So you'd rather think that you're losing on purpose. But it's yet another deception of trading. In life we may deceive ourselves in many fields and get away with it, but with trading the fact that you're losing money keeps on forcing you to face reality. First of all, no one says you should lose real money. You can paper trade until you find something that works. Second of all, the best way to go is automated systems. First you back-test a system until you find something that has worked in the past. Then you forward-test that system for a couple of months and see if it also works in the future. Then you should be safe to use it. You'll see that once you find something that really works, you will use it, like I am doing now. The thing many of us say that we're masochistic is just the wrong explanation for our losses: we lose because we don't know what works yet (and may never find out if we go about it the wrong way, by discretionary trading forever). Also, in the same way, you may think you don't apply the stoploss because you are masochistic and want to lose, but the truth is that you're not really sure whether that stoploss makes sense and works. And that's because you don't have any back-tests or statistical evidence - if you do discretionary trading you can only go by memory, but memory is not good enough: once you used it and it went right back up, and you took a loss for no reason. Another time you didn't use it, and you made money because of it... so the next time you will definitely hesitate before applying that stoploss. Not because you are stupid and masochistic, but because you are intelligent. Nonetheless, when you'll lose because you didn't apply the stoploss, you will be forgetful and think you lost money because you didn't apply the stoploss (and in that case it will be true), but by thinking that, you will be forgetting all the times that you made money by not applying that same stoploss. The only way to get out of this loop is to back-test the effectiveness of that stoploss and of your whole method (which in many cases you don't even know what exactly is). Trust me - I've been there, and for years I was thinking "what is wrong with me?". Nothing is wrong: you just don't know what works, and that is why you're not applying rules which may not even work. The solution is back-testing, trading systems, and even better automated trading. Many of us start trading before preparing ourselves, and that's a mistake unless we're ok with blowing out a few accounts. It's as if a kid operated on patients as soon as he says "when I grow up I wanna be a doctor", and then wondered "why are all my patients dying?". Traders at the beginning are like that kid. And many give up after killing a few patients. Not having a back-tested profitable method will simply kill your account.
Watch this movie, rogue trader. It's a very good one. He blew out a bank for the reasons above (there are many unprofitable traders in banks, who may have degrees from prestigious universities): http://www.veoh.com/browse/videos/category/entertainment/watch/v76509298KPGjHGk
Get a free account with veoh.com and download the free player. Then the movie will start automatically. If it still doesn't work, then do a simple search on veoh.com for "rogue trader". I watched it yesterday.