8/28/2007 +$121.22, 3 trades (2W, 1L) USDJPY: +14/20 D Just plain sloppy this morning - my brain must have been on vacation or something. Embarrassed to even post the chart. Quitting early.
8/29/2007 -$250.00, 2 trades (1W, 1L) EURUSD: -25/115 8/30/2007 +$50.00, 1 trade (1W) EURUSD: +5/115 9/7/2007 +$3,113.98, 4 trades (4W) USDJPY: +353/289 F Waited to post the results since 8/29 since the days have sort of flowed together like a river of shit after I opened up my last "lotto trades" and ended up getting caught in the flow. I had basically become addicted (like I was afraid would happen) to these lotto tickets. All I wanted was to end August with another +$500 when I opened up one long EURUSD and one short USDJPY and here is what happened... I was initially right on the first EURUSD trade, but closed it for +25, reversed it and then added to that new loser. I gave up on that and closed one position for a 50 pip loss (at what was basically the top of the day), giving me -25 for the 8/29. Held on for a day and was able to close the last position for +5 on 8/30. As for USDJPY, it turns out I sold the bottom on 8/29 and started digging myself into a nice hole. Watching day and night, I put on hard stops beginning at 116.80 in case it got really out of hand. Luckily someone was on my side and giving great resistance ~116.50 and then NFP came out today and sealed the deal for me to close all these positions for a total of +353 pips. Looking back I should have kept one or two open over the weekend, but I was just so tired of keeping them open thinking about them day and night. It is just not the way I am comfortable trading. I am making a promise to myself to not even think about trading for the next week - and preferably not until I quit worrying about making money. I may have been right in the end about most of these positions, but being right doesn't pay the bills.
9/13/2007 - 9/20/2007 +$2,159.82, 5 trades (5W) USDJPY: +246/240 C Little more cautious with these longer time frame positions. They didn't play out exactly as I had planned, but will take what is given to me. Finally getting my office put back together after my move; so am looking forward to getting back to the regular routine.
9/21/2007 - 9/24/2007 +$810.74, 3 trades (3W) EURUSD: +25/63 USDJPY: +65/121 B Pretty much in line with what I was expecting and closed positions according to plan.
9/26/2007 - 9/27/2007 +$583.03, 6 trades (5W, 1L) EURUSD: +8/19 USDJPY: +70/108 C Mistakenly started with a longer term view and began trading like I was using my system on the shorter time frames. Sometimes it is good to be lucky and taking some larger risks paid off this month (my best month ever). Shouldn't expect it like this always, but it is a nice spike in the monthly equity curve.
10/1/2007 +$244.30, 1 trade (1W) EURUSD: +25/37 B Held position to target. Nice clean start to the month.
10/2/2007 -17.28, 2 trades (1W, 1L) USDJPY: -2/105 D "D" is for "dumb-ass" today. Made a series of small errors that revealed some stupidity in hindsight. Began by watching the 2 positions I had on late last night (error one... I don't normally watch at night because I like my sleep). When the trend got close to where I was looking for, I began telling myself I would close at 33; when 33 came, I said I'll close at 30; when 37 came before 30, I said fuck it and would put on a limit for 30 - I wanted to sleep (error two... I had a target that was hit and didn't take it because I got greedy). When I went to put on the limit order I accidentally clicked on "close position" rather than "order ticket" (error three... mouse click mistake because I was tired). Fortunately, it has been a long time since I've made a keystroke error and it was a tiny loss... overall it was nothing to get really upset about - just a reminder to be careful.
10/3/2007 +$227.99, 3 trades (3W) EURUSD: +24/60 C Was starting to get that feeling of invincibility when I let one position get too far in the hole. I know when I start to get that feeling that I am close to getting my ass handed to me - it is time for me to really be cautious.
This isn't my obituary, but I am afraid reaching my goal this year is not going to be possible after my undisciplined November (I have completely erased the gains made during the past two months). Looking back, my outstanding September was the result of a series of lotto ticket trades. At the time I realized that it was more luck than skill, but my sloppiness ridiculous in October and November. I lost complete control and the need to be right in a trade was stroking my ego, rather than the daily P&L. I failed because I was predicting the trend (not reacting) and when my predictions were wrong I would add to the loser and hope it would come back in my favor. I was doing everything completely wrong... I was more concerned with entries and ignored any sort of stops. I finally gained the strength today to say to myself "it's time to stop hoping" and closed all the open positions. November was a terrible month for me and I am ashamed of the results. I appreciate the supportive comments from the ET members and although I am obviously not ready to go full-time yet, someday I will be proud of my results.
At least you have the balls to admit your errors. There's another thread going on right now where a failed trader is making all sorts of excuses as to why he failed. You're simply saying 'I messed up'. I swear, after being around here for a while, it is 100% true that failure in trading comes quickly to those who are used to living their lives without taking responsibility for their own outcomes. We all know how many people there are like that. Mix that with a trading account and it's all over before it starts. Good luck to you.