Yes that's a problem, but I think that's what most brokers would do. Here's a related horror story: http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/showt...6&highlight=google ira exercised&pagenumber=1
Yeah, but they have to at least look at the account to see what the positions are. Otherwise they'd be buying back everyone's ITM covered calls on expiration. I've heard several horror stories like that one. I'd say it's a little different though because in that one it doesn't look like there was a hedge in the account that the broker broke up. They just let that one get exercised for some unknown reason.
If you trade the same sort of contract in a regular account (for example MSFT) and then you trade that same contract in an IRA, then wash sales can be created due to this activity (across accounts).