Mental block due to trading Mentor passing away...unable to trade

Discussion in 'Psychology' started by JBM, Sep 20, 2016.

  1. qxr1011

    qxr1011


    he should not trade with any money at all, and instead switch to paper trading
     
    #21     Sep 20, 2016
  2. JBM,

    This is just ONE opinion, among many and other possible opinions.
    So here we go:

    In my views, you seem to be going through a grieving process. And this is normal.
    You developed a close relationship to your mentor ( the joy of trading together,
    bouncing trading views, the trusting relationship, etc.).
    Now, if for instance, your mum or dad were to die, would you just continue trading
    without any break?
    Here it seems your relationship with your mentor was a deep one emotionnally, so
    you need to grieve.
    I can not tell you more about the grieving process, but you might want to check
    Bouddhists, religions about how to go about it.
    When your grieving is done, then will be the time to think of how you could honor
    the memory of your mentor - such as reproducing the relationship with another person,
    where you'd be the mentor. You will need to spend some time thinking about who
    to take as a mentee (?), as the mentee would have to be someone who should honor
    the memory of the relation you had with your mentor.

    Just an opinion, not the truth.
     
    #22     Sep 20, 2016
    Andrea Wylan and JackRab like this.
  3. ...You don't need a mentor -- everything you need is inside you already
    [​IMG] :confused:o_O
     
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2016
    #23     Sep 20, 2016
  4. Just stop trading until you are done grieving. Most expensive thing I ever did was attempt to trade the week after my mom died.
     
    #24     Sep 20, 2016
  5. 1shooter

    1shooter

    Personally i won't pick up a apprentice not a mentor. Pass along the skills to someone else and take his old role. Everyone grieves in different ways, i say fill his shoes the whole way. You can learn a lot more from teaching than you can from trying to learn from someone else. I would say your past the learning portion of you life's journey. (Not that you done learning just the bulk of it) Read some of his (your) books. Try to pick up a grass hopper. Someone probably showed him in a similar fashion. The important thing is you know you have a problem, fixing it is just a matter of steps. Not knowing you have a problem is way worse.
     
    #25     Sep 20, 2016
  6. JackRab

    JackRab

    I think it's a grieving process as well, like @smallStops says. If that's the case, maybe what @learner2007 suggested might help somewhat... I don't think that's strange at all. You're kinda stuck in a psychological state where you miss your trading buddy.

    Do you trade from home? Full time or part time? What's your day job?

    If you miss a trading buddy to talk to, I totally get that. Trading is usually quite boring and lonely, hence ET! ;). After 10 years trading together you probably miss the feedback etc, but I doubt you would need another mentor... you need to rise up to the plate mate!

    What about getting involved in some kind of local trading group, which has regular meetings, to at least get feedback and have interesting conversations about the markets?
     
    #26     Sep 21, 2016
  7. #27     Sep 21, 2016
  8. Canoe007

    Canoe007

    This.

    Plus, or before the above, get help/support with the grieving process, to ensure you're not stuck somewhere. Ask your doctor to recommend someone.

    Question/speculation: for later, does something like a Sport Performance Physiologist make sense?
     
    #28     Sep 21, 2016
  9. mlawson71

    mlawson71

    Your grief is very fresh, it's normal that you can't focus properly. Give yourself time to go through the grieving process. Talk to a counselor if necessary. Once you feel sufficiently recovered, whenever that may be, maybe look for another partner if you feel that you need one? Someone you can trust.
     
    #29     Sep 22, 2016
  10. yiehom

    yiehom

    No need for names to be called, this is the best advice so far. Better yet, he should have his statue sit in the chair and converse with him as he trades. Yes, it works !

     
    #30     Sep 25, 2016