MacFutures Analyst

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by guide-me-in, Feb 26, 2004.

  1. "His name was guv'nor
    He was a trader
    Four fingers in the air
    Five offered everywhere
    He bought the fucking lot
    They looked like they'd been shot
    And then there came the rate cut
    And he....er....squeezed a spot

    At the trade desk ( etc etc you get the drift )
     
    #61     Feb 27, 2004
  2. TsunTzu

    TsunTzu

    Was that sqwarked?? what did you do, buy or sell?? what newswire was it on?
     
    #62     Feb 27, 2004
  3. Now here's a little story
    To tell it is a must
    About an unsung hero
    That moves away the dust

    Some people make a fortune
    Others earn a mint
    My old man don't earn much
    In fact he's bloomin' skint

    Oh my old man's a dustman
    He wears a dustman's hat
    He wears cor blimey trousers
    And he lives in a council flat
    He looks a proper 'nana
    In his great big hob nailed boots
    He's got such a job to pull 'em up
    That he calls 'em daisy roots

    Some folks give tips at christmas
    And some of them forget
    So when he picks their bins up
    He spills some on the step
    Now one old man got nasty
    And to the council wrote
    Next time my old man went round there
    He punched him up the throat

    Oh my old man's a dustman
    He wears a dustman's hat
    He wears cor blimey trousers
    And he lives in a council flat

    I say I say Les
    (Yeah)
    I found a police dog in my dustbin
    (How do you know it was a police dog)
    He had a policeman with him

    Though my old mans a dustman
    He's got an 'art of gold
    He got married recently
    Though he's 86 years old
    We said 'ere hang on dad
    You're getting past your prime
    He said well when you get my age
    It 'elps to pass the time

    Oh my old man's a dustman
    He wears a dustman's hat
    He wears cor blimey trousers
    And he lives in a council flat

    I say I say I say
    My dustbin's full of lilies
    (Well throw'em away then)
    I can't lily's wearing 'em

    Now one day whilst in a hurry
    He missed a ladies bin
    He hadn't gone but a few yards
    When she chased after him
    What game d'you think you're playing
    She cried right from the 'art
    You've missed me am I too late
    Nah jump up on the cart

    Oh my old man's a dustman
    He wears a dustman's hat
    He wears cor blimey trousers
    And he lives in a council flat

    I say I say I say
    (Not you again)
    My dustbin's absolutely full with toadstools
    (How d'you know it's full)
    Cuz there's not mushroom inside

    He found a tiger's head one day
    Nailed to a piece of wood
    The tiger looked quite miserable
    But I suppose he should
    Just then from out the window
    A voice began to wail
    He said Oy where's me tigers head
    Four feet from his tail

    Oh my old man's a dustman
    He wears a dustman's hat
    He wears cor blimey trousers
    And he lives in a council flat

    Next time you see a dustman
    Looking all pale and sad
    Don't kick him in the dustbin
    It might me my old dad
     
    #63     Feb 27, 2004
  4. #My old man's a dustman, he's got cancer too
    Silly fucking arsehole, he's got it up the flue
    He's got so much of fucking cancer it drives him fucking mad
    He says, "I've got fucking cancer", and he's my fucking Dad
    Oh, what a fucking boring cunt, he goes on and on all day
    He's got this fucking cancer and he's too gone on the way
     
    #64     Feb 27, 2004
  5. #My Mum came into the room and sucked my fucking knob, oh!
    She put her mouth right, her mouth right round it and then she done a gob
    On the end of it to make it smooth and make it nice and soft
    And then she tossed me right off with her, er, Mrs. Mopp
    Who came into the ..... (starts laughing)
     
    #65     Feb 27, 2004

  6. squawk

    • verb 1 (of a bird) make a loud, harsh noise. 2 say something in a loud, discordant tone.

    • noun an act of squawking.

    — DERIVATIVES squawker noun.

    You want to play with the big boys Tsunny - get your spelling in order.

    We're bloody hard bastards
     
    #66     Feb 27, 2004
  7. ..... What a cunt! He keeps waking us up at night, this fucking noise goes on! This fucking cough, his fucking cancer! We can't fucking sleep! I's trying to watch Emmerdale Farm and this fucking cough came on and I couldn't fucking concentrate on a fucking good programme 'cause my old man was dying of this fucking cough .....
     
    #67     Feb 27, 2004
  8. TsunTzu

    TsunTzu

    good point but you didnt pick this up;

    mac analsyt <------?????
    #My Mum came into the room and sucked my fucking knob, oh
     
    #68     Feb 27, 2004
  9. Is it possible to post something remotely serious on here please?

    What is the Ted Spread ?

    Not directed at you nomate - obviously never been near a future in your life.
     
    #69     Feb 27, 2004

  10. Ted is the bloke that spreads your mums legs
     
    #70     Feb 27, 2004