Jokes 2

"Someone's been eating my porridge!" said Papa bear.

Mother bear sighed and poured him another bowl.

Life was tough and draining for her, now that her husband was suffering from Alzheimer's.

 

Did you try clicking on the little arrow in the middle of the picture?

 

Yiayia = Grandma

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That's a good one!

 

An anteater walks into a bar and says that he'd like a drink. "Okay," says the bartender. "How about a beer?" "Noooooooooo," replies the anteater. "Then how about a gin and tonic?" "Noooooooooo." "A martini?" "Noooooooooo." Finally, the bartender gets fed up and says, "Hey, listen buddy, if you don't mind me asking - why the long no's?"

 

"Doctor, I'd like you to evaluate my 13 year-old son."

"Ok, he's suffering from a transient psychosis with an intermittent rage disorder, punctuated by episodic radical mood swings, but his prognosis is good for full recovery."

"How can you say all that without even meeting him?"

"I thought you said he's 13?"

 

Just Saw These, Good Quotes

"Good luck only knocks once, but bad luck is a lot more patient...!"
"I'm trying to get out of my mental/psychological impasse, but I can't remember how I got into it...!"
"Those who pretend they know everything annoy those of us who do know it all...!"
"The best medicine for uncontrollable caugh is a bowl of strong, extra hot chili; afterwards, you are afraid to caugh...!"
"A society of idiots is naturally class conscious: for example, a rich idiot is, of course, rich, but a poor idiot is just an idiot...!"

 

Your Fat Tuesday is Charlie Sheen's tuesday.

 

I don't mind going to work, it's the eight hour wait to go home that's bullshit.

 

My wife and I were at her parents house last night for dinner. At the dining table my wife asked me to pass her the salt. I shook my head and refused to pass it to her, resulting in her having to reach all the way across me to get it.

She turned to me and said " Could you seriously be any more immature?"

So I pulled my pants down, took the pineapple from the fruit bowl, placed it on my head, and began the Macarena dance.

That'll teach the bitch not to test me.