Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. "Grandson, I have a confession to make. I've been faking Alzheimer's disease."

    Every morning for 15 years my Grandad woke up and said the same thing.
     
    #8581     Feb 17, 2011
  2. Yannis

    Yannis

    Tico Tico Tico Tico

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    :) :) :)
     
    #8582     Feb 17, 2011
  3. fhl

    fhl

    A young boy ran excitedly into the house yelling "Grandpa! Make a sound like a frog!"
    Grandpa says, "Whoa! Whatta ya mean make a noise like a frog?"
    "You know, that noise that frogs make at night."
    "Why do you want me to do that?" Grandpa asks.
    And the boy tells him, "Grandma says that when you croak, we're going to Disneyland!"
     
    #8583     Feb 17, 2011
  4. Yannis

    Yannis

    #8584     Feb 18, 2011
  5. Pop quiz for Watson

    The answer is

    "And thus I clothe my naked vampire squid
    With old ends stolen out of holy writ."

    Who was.

    A. Rolling Stone
    B. Pastor Blankfein
    C. Nutmeg on Shakespeare
     
    #8585     Feb 18, 2011
  6. #8586     Feb 18, 2011
  7. fhl

    fhl

    I told my wife I'll always love her, even if I have to always love her from no closer than 300 feet.
     
    #8587     Feb 18, 2011
  8. Yea, and they put it to music. {:>)


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    #8588     Feb 18, 2011
  9. A man went on a ski trip, and was knocked unconscious by the chair lift. He called his insurance company from the hospital, but it refused to cover his injury.

    "Why is the injury not covered?" he asked.

    "You got hit in the head by a chair lift," the insurance rep said. "That makes you a fucking idiot, and we consider that a pre-existing condition."
     
    #8589     Feb 18, 2011
  10. One day my Dad came home from work and said "Someone stole my wallet."

    I ask him, "I wonder where he will spend the moths?"
     
    #8590     Feb 19, 2011