Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. Yannis

    Yannis

    Duh!

    Computers can never fully replace humans. They may become capable of incredible artificial intelligence, but they will never master REAL stupidity...

    :) :) :)
     
    #8121     Dec 7, 2010
  2. fhl

    fhl

    Scratch here ¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦ to see if you've won!
     
    #8122     Dec 7, 2010
  3. fhl

    fhl

    Remember when someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown BUT it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and bi**h slap the pr*ck!!
     
    #8123     Dec 7, 2010
  4. [​IMG]
     
    #8124     Dec 7, 2010
  5. fhl

    fhl

    I was just thinking. If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?

    Then I thought, well, we might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.
     
    #8125     Dec 7, 2010
  6. Friendly advice/ Holiday Safety...

    Please, take care of yourself. A recent joint study conducted by the Department of Health and the Department of Motor Vehicles indicates that 23% of traffic accidents are alcohol related.

    This means that the remaining 77% are caused by assholes who just drink water, coffee, carbonated drinks, juices, energy drinks, and shit like that.

    Therefore, beware of those who do not drink alcohol. They cause three times as many accidents.

    This message is sent by someone who worries about your well being
     
    #8126     Dec 7, 2010
  7. I'm very non traditional.

    My wife was the one on her knees when I proposed.
     
    #8127     Dec 7, 2010
  8. I've been banned from the Salvation Army Soup Kitchen.

    I was serving the tramps some soup and they were dragging their asses.

    So all I said was "Get a move on, some of us have homes to go to!"
     
    #8128     Dec 7, 2010
  9. You know you're getting old when..


    You can't run up the stairs for fear of having a heart attack
    but you have to risk it in case you shit yourself before you get to the toilet.
     
    #8129     Dec 8, 2010
  10. I never got on with my Dad while growing up.

    Kids used to come up to me and say, "My Dad can beat up your Dad." I'd say, "Good, when is he available?"
     
    #8130     Dec 8, 2010