A double header: My dear old grandmother, bless her, used to be a massive crossword fan. I visit her grave every year, but this year I couldn't recall quite where she was buried. Then I remembered, "3 down, 4 across." ---------------- I'd never be unfaithful to my wife for the reason that I love my house very much.
The gov't has been working hard to find out people's opinions on unemployment. They've finally concluded that a 9% unemployment rate is acceptable to 91% of the population.
I went to the barbers today and he said, "You're going bald." I said, "Well you better get a move on then."
I lost my wedding ring yesterday. I had a brief look under the sofa but wasn't really bothered, so my wife told me to look harder. I've shaved my hair and bought a new Nike tracksuit, joined a gym, wear a gold chain but I still can't find it.
Just can't stop laughing at this. <img src=http://www.elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=3002754
<img src="http://tctechcrunch.files.wordpress.com/2010/11/c-section-comics-iphone-vs-android-vs.jpeg" alt="some_text"/>
Call me paranoid, but my girlfriend split up with me and I suspect it was because of a love triangle: her, me, and the man I could have been.