The 33 trapped miners in Chile are now being supplied with rice and beans. And relatives have lit candles around the entrance. They haven't thought this through.
I was kind of worried on my overseas flight until i found out just what a generous airline I was flying. The stewardess came over the intercom and said: "Your seats cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."
Then we had one heckuva hard landing. The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault, it was the asphalt."
Tom counted right (10) but the graduating class didn't and were asking the principal to give Tom another chance...
I was Eatontown once. I had a girlfriend back in the day who asked me if I'd kiss her where it stinks. That's where I took her.
That was an import - export joke. Fer instance Wal-Mart announced plans to open its first retail store in China. Tags on clothes and stickers on items will read, "Made Here."