So, one day Hillary and Sen. McCain were on a popular afternoon talk show discussing strategies for the upcoming elections, party affiliations and so on. Naturally, toward the end of the interview everyone on set started loosening up as is usually the case and the talk turned to sex, to which Sen. McCain hinted to his sexual prowess. Hillary gazed at him through suspicious eyes and thought to herself, "Could this guy actually be for real? I must find out for myself, and give Bill a little taste of his own medicine at the same time". So, after the show, she approaches Sen. McCain, and says, "I must admit, I am a bit intrigued by your claims of incredible staying power, and my sex life has been bleak at best, so I want you to prove to me that you are all you claim to be. It will go a long way towards earning my respect". They retire to the nearest Hotel after the show and McCain proceeds to hammer the daylights out of her. Hillary is screaming, passing in and out from raw sexual euphoria, all the while Johnny boy is maintaing his cool, not to mention a respectable erection. Two, maybe three hours pass by, and finally, Hillary begs him to stop. Gasping for her breath, she says to him, " I cannot believe what just happened here. You, an elderly old geezer, just gave me what was perhaps the best sexual experience of my life! At your age! I suppose you truly are an American hero! I have just one question though, can you do it again?" Sen. McCain turns to Hillary and says, " Certainly my dear. Just on thing however: At my age this can get a bit tiring. I would need a short nap, say 45 minutes or so. Is that okay?" "Certainly..." Hillary replies. "Also," say McCain, " while I am napping, I would require you to place both hands very firmly around my penis and keep them there until I wake, and then I will be recharged and give you another round of the most mind blowing sex you have ever experienced. No loose grips here, but a good old fashioned choke hold, okay?" So, after he wakes up, they go at it again. Hillary is screaming, cellulose is flying off the walls. Two more hours pass, she cannot take it anymore and begs him to stop. "That was amazing," says Hillary. "I cannot believe what just went on here. You, an old fart, just gave me the most intense sexual experience of my life. Twice! And your staying power! The first time was incredible enough, but to do that a second time! With only a 45 minute nap. At your age! Simply amazing." " But tell me, whay did I need to hold both hands firmly around your cock while you were sleeping?" asks Hillary. "Well," says McCain, "The last time I fucked a Democrat, she stole my wallet."
Store clerk to female customer: "I am sorry miss, but this $50 dollar bill is counterfeit" Woman: "Damn! I've just been seduced!"
A homeless guy asked for some change, said his underpants had holes in them. I said "yea I can see where your coming from"
Nutmeg was reading Bloomberg and suddenly got a hard-on... "Strippers Declare Inflation Dead in Zero-Coupon Bonds" he couldn't tell why though.... sick pervert...
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