Jokes 2

Thursday's crash was so bad the E*Trade baby had to be changed - SNL

 

"Poems are made by fools like me, But only God can make a tree."

If you haven't seen a cell phone tree you haven't lived.

 

Thanks Mom......for all your help

Happy Mothers Day.

 

At first I thought that was the secret to a very healthy society - butt ugly nurses! Nobody would dare go to the hospital.

 

“ Life is tough,”

“It is so hard to live now!”

“Don’t worry,” the teacher advised.

“Life is short. Be patient"

 

How fast is your car?

Well, it keeps about six months ahead of my income generally.

 

Upon being questioned as to the occupation of his father, the young man replied, "He cleans out the bank."

"Janitor or president?" was the final question.

 

Homeless guy: Please sir, may I have a quarter?

Banker: I don't have any change right now. I'll give it to you next time.

Homeless guy: Sir, that's the kind of credit that had made me bankrupt.

 

My neighbor the plumber says, 'Every time you flush your toilet you're putting food in my family's mouth'

 

That's so funny.

Your crap is my family's bread & butter.".......