Men strike back! How many men does it take to open a beer None. It should be opened when she brings it. Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with 'A man once told me......' How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven. Women will never be equal to men Until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. Why do men die before their wives? They want to.
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The SEC declined to comment beyond saying that the senior people at the unit that oversaw Lehman had left the regulator. ---------------------------- And the dog at the homework.
Big Problem Solved! Here's a solution to all the controversy over full-body scanners at the airports: have a safe booth that you can step into that will not X-ray you, but will detonate any explosive device you may have on you. It would be a win-win for everyone, and there would be none of this crap about racial profiling and looking through peopleâs clothing. Moreover, this method would eliminate a long and expensive trial. Justice would be quick and swift. Case Closed! This is so simple that it's brilliant. I can see it now: you're in the airport terminal and you hear a muffled explosion. Shortly thereafter an announcement comes over the PA system, "Attention standby passengers: we now have a seat available on flight number..."
My friend was sitting down reading a book. I couldn't see what it was but I heard him reading out loud. "The use of words to convey a meaning that is the opposite of its literal meaning." I asked him what he was reading and he told me it was the dictionary. He said that since his eyesight was getting worse he wanted to improve his vocabulary before it was too late. At that point his glasses fell off and broke. I thought: 'That's ironic.'