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hahahaha If I ever hear a fellow European over here speaking like he came from the Deep South I'll send you a card to let you know there are some of yours that have escaped we have plenty of our own, so don't bother to send any more thx
Those Smart Foreigners European International Airways sent its inaugural Super Airbus flight to JFK under the command of its two best pilots. Approach Control tells 'em they're cleared onto final and hands 'em off to the tower, but they're sorta struggling with English and sorta missed a word or two... However, it was a nice flying day and they decide to just land the airplane. They get in close to the runway and the left seat hollers "lookit that runway! It's 'way too short! Flaps, gimmee full flaps, reverse thrust, drop the anchor!" and he dumps it on the numbers. The airplane comes to a screeching halt two feet before the end of the concrete amidst billowing clouds of burning tire and brake smoke. Left seat says "I don't believe how short this runway is, it's only a cupple hunnert feet long!" Right seat muses, "Yeah, but jeez boss look, it's gotta be at least twelve THOUSAND feet wide!!!"
Isn't Europe Smart? Early attempts to introduce hand grenades into the Irish army were none too successful. Actually, there were times when the very survival of the species seemed in doubt. Soldiers were asked to pull the pin, count to ten and then throw the grenade. Trouble was, after their morning few shots of Irish Whiskey, they needed both hands to count to ten, and they would store the grenade between their legs in the meantime...
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<img src="http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2006/06/14/cruisepostcard_wideweb__470x309,0.jpg" /> I'm so glad there are women who support our navy.
I was about to go pick up my mother-in-law from the airport when my wife warned me that she thought Mom's memory was going, which gave me a great idea. When I got to the airport I said, "Thanks for coming. Have a nice flight!"
An armless and legless man knocks on the door of a brothel, A woman opens the door and says: "What do you want, stumpy?" The cripple replies, "Isn't that obvious? What the fuck do you think I knocked with"
Why is it when your wife becomes pregnant, all her female friends rub her tummy and say âcongratulations?â But none of them rub your dick and say âwell doneâ!