A guy checks out at the grocery isle. The bagger asks him, "paper or plastic". The man replies, "makes no difference to me. I'm bisackual.
I've been asking the cashiers at WMT if they would mind packing things of the same color together. I need red things together, blue things together. Sometimes they ask why, I tell them "I count cards" (using my best Rainman voice).
Once upon a time there was a very large office building in a very large city. This building had 40 levels: level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40. One day Dick Fuld decided to get a PA system installed on every level, in case there was ever a need for an emergency liquidation of assets and everyone in the building needed to be contacted at once. The system was installed on every level: level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40. One day, an employee named Putzorino was doing some paperwork on the 21st level when he saw the pager for the PA system in his boss's office. He could not resist. He picked up the pager, turned it on, cleared his throat, and told a joke. It was funniest joke anyone in the building had ever heard. They were rolling in the aisles, laughing their heads off. The traders on level 3 were in tears. The accountants on level 34 were in hysterics. In fact, workers on every level -- level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40 -- could not stop laughing. He walked out the door of his boss's office, feeling all proud of himself, when who should he run into but his boss. "Putzy, come with me now!" Mr Putzy relunctantly followed his boss back into his office. His boss looked at him with fury in his eyes (he was that kind of guy especially while running on a treadmill). "You Putz," he said, "your joke was very disruptive to the workers in this building! Productivity was decreased on level 1, level 2, level 3, level 4, level 5, level 6, level 7, level 8, level 9, level 10, level 11, level 12, level 13, level 14, level 15, level 16, level 17, level 18, level 19, level 20, level 21, level 22, level 23, level 24, level 25, level 26, level 27, level 28, level 29, level 30, level 31, level 32, level 33, level 34, level 35, level 36, level 37, level 38, level 39, and level 40! (Whoa really?) You're fired! Clean out your desk and get out!" But then his frown softened and he added, "Still, I have to admit, that joke was funny on so many levels."
McDonalds is coming out with a new burger. It's a 50 year old piece of meat between two 8 year old buns. It's called the MacJackson burger. :eek: :eek: :eek:
That reminds me of all those jokes from '93......... What has 50 testicles and two pubic hairs? An MJ sleep over.