Doctor: Well, I've got some good news, and some bad news. I'll start with the bad news. I can tell the good news to your widow.
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When I was a kid growing up, my parents would always say, "Excuse my French" just after a swear word. I'll never forget the first day at school when my teacher asked if any of us knew any French.
Resolved QuestionShow me another » I sold my only car to help pay for gas money, but now gas has come down in price. How do I get my car back? 7 months ago In other news: Did your father sell you to pay for child support?
A gynecologist had become fed up with mal practice insurance and HMO Paperwork, and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where Skillful hands would be beneficial; He decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the Instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade." "The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark." After a pause, the instructor added, I gave you an extra 50% because you did the entire job through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire career"
President Obama visited a school to see if he was popular among the youth of America. He held a short speech and asked some children if they had any questions for him. Little Bob raised his hand and said: âI have three questions. 1) How did you win the election even though you haven't proved your citizenship? 2) Why did you say you were closing Guantanamo and not close it? 3) Do you agree with me, that the bombing of a police station in San Francisco in the 60's was a terrorist act? At that point the bell rings and all children run out of the classroom. After 5 minutes all the children are back inside and Obama again asks the children if there are any questions they would like to ask. This time Joe raises his hand and says he has five questions: 1) How did you win the election even though you haven't proved your citizenship? 2) Why did you say you were closing Guantanamo and not close it? 3) Do you agree with me, that the bombing of a police station in San Francisco in the 60's was a terrorist act? 4) Why did the bell ring 20 minutes early? 5) Where is Bob?
An opinion poll has shown that 60% of Iranians believe the recent election was rigged...... However 70% believe everything was fair.