There was an old man from Madras Who swallowed a packet of seeds His balls were covered in grass And out of his arse grew weeds
Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asked the older boy, 'Son, how old are you?' 'Eight', the boy replied. The man continued, 'Do you know what these are used for?' The boy replied, 'Not exactly, but they aren't for me. They're for him. He's my brother. He's four. We saw on TV that if you use these, you would be able to swim, play tennis and ride a bike. Right now, he can't do none of those'.
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I knew this was a straight piece. I knew it!!! And I watched it anyway thinking it was possible something demented would happen, because it was you . There's a bit in Geo Burn's book "My Best Friend" where he's at a Hollywood party. Burn's always picked on Jack Benny, and Benny is at the fireplace, and he's about to light a cigar. Burn's goes, "quiet everybody. Jack is going to do his famous "match bit". Benny is oblivious to the goings on, he's just going to light a cigar, but with the deafening silence, he turns around to see all of Hollywoods' elite just staring at him. I guess you had to be there, or be able to play the accordian.
Jack is going to do his famous "match bit". ---------------- Same here. Only mine is a coffee commercial. Someone will say, "Nutmeg is going to do his "coffee bit" everyone stops what they are doing and watches. I drink a sip and say "thanks for watching".
Any of you watch the Wire? I think it's off the air now but it was great. Anyways, here it is with a laugh track. <object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/WDIi0dzmvpE&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WDIi0dzmvpE&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>