Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. A man walks into a cunt and fucks for a bastard about Tourette's Syndrome.
     
    #4481     Apr 13, 2009
  2. fhl

    fhl

    The Department Of Defense briefed the President this morning. They told President Obama that 2 Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq. He collapsed onto his desk, head in his hands, visibly shaken almost in tears. Finally, he composed himself and asked, "Just how many is a brazilian?"
     
    #4482     Apr 13, 2009
  3. Now if that were McCain or Bush, I might even believe it.
     
    #4483     Apr 13, 2009
  4. In developing news, 60 Brazilian polticians change their name to Barack Obama.
     
    #4484     Apr 13, 2009
  5. Yannis

    Yannis

    #4485     Apr 13, 2009
  6. Ahhhhh. That makes sense.

    I thought it sounded like one of those dried out biscuits you get in a tin with a little bit of jam. But that didn't make sense.

    Crufts and tea, or something.
     
    #4486     Apr 13, 2009
  7. Yannis

    Yannis

  8. NoDoji

    NoDoji

    Three notes walk into a bar...

    A ‘C’, an ‘E-flat’, and a ‘G’ go into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors." So the E-flat leaves, and the C and the G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished and the G is out flat.

    An F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough. A ‘D’ comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying, "Excuse me. I'll just be a second."

    Then an A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor.

    Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and exclaims, "Get out NOW! You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight."

    The E-flat, not easily deflated, comes back to the bar the next night in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender (who used to have a nice corporate job until his company downsized) says, "You're looking sharp tonight, come on in! This could be a major development."

    This proves to be the case, as the E-flat takes off the suit, and everything else, and stands there au natural.

    Eventually, the C sobers up, and realizes in horror that he's under a rest. The C is brought to trial, is found guilty of contributing to the diminution of a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of ‘DS’ without Coda at an upscale correctional facility. On appeal, however, the C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.

    The bartender decides, however, that since he's only had tenor so patrons, and the soprano out in the bathroom, everything has become altoo much treble; he needs a rest, and closes the bar.
     
    #4488     Apr 13, 2009
  9. over my head.:D
     
    #4489     Apr 13, 2009

  10. Aaahaha!!! So what has happened to A, it was a minor, or to the 7th drink, or diminished?
     
    #4490     Apr 13, 2009