Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. WASHINGTON - A bullish President Obama says the ever-sinking Dow hasn't gotten him down - in fact, this might be a smart time to buy into the stock market.

    "But if profit-and-earning ratios are starting to get you down and long term is not your perspsective join me on Yahoo option groups "Options are like acorns" as I explain Theetah Beetah and Cheetah- greeks bearing gifts." Obama said Tuesday
     
    #4271     Mar 4, 2009
  2. A lesson to be learned by all exporters – KNOW YOUR MARKET
    A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment
    A friend asked: Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?

    The salesman explained

    When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I would make a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there

    But, I had a problem. I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through three posters

    [​IMG][​IMG][​IMG]


    First poster : A man lying in the hot desert sand ..totally exhausted and fainting

    Second poster : The man is drinking our Cola


    Third poster : Our man is now totally refreshed


    And Then these posters were pasted all over the place
    "Then that should have worked!!" said the friend
    The hell it should had ?!! said the salesman “I also didn’t realize that Arabs go from right to left”
     
    #4272     Mar 4, 2009
  3. [​IMG]
     
    #4273     Mar 4, 2009
  4. Reflections On Life

    1. Marriage changes passion. Suddenly, you're in bed with a relative.

    2. Why is it we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?

    3. When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."

    4. I saw a young woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "implants?" She hit me.

    5. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail; but a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn ... That was fun!"
     
    #4274     Mar 5, 2009
  5. Yannis

    Yannis

    Cowboy Smarts

    Two cowboys could never tell their horses apart. So the first cowboy said, "I've got it!" The second cowboy said "What?" "I'll shave the main on my horse." Let's do it!” So the cowboy shaves the main on his horse. But after a while the main grew back. The cowboys are having a really hard time telling them apart.

    Then the first cowboy said again, "I've got it! "What? What? What’s your idea now? says the other. "I'll cut the tail on my horse really small.." "Alright! Let's do it!" So he cut the tail really short. But after a while it grew back.

    Finally the second cowboy has an idea: "How about this - you take the big black one and I'll take little white one!!!!"

    :) :) :)
     
    #4275     Mar 5, 2009
  6. Yannis

    Yannis

    LOL!!! :)
     
    #4276     Mar 5, 2009
  7. object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/L2QqvcdKQdM&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/L2QqvcdKQdM&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
     
    #4277     Mar 5, 2009
  8. Yannis

    Yannis

  9. fhl

    fhl

    A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament triumphs. After about and hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to get lost. " Why?", one asked, as they moved off.

    "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
     
    #4279     Mar 6, 2009
  10. fhl

    fhl

    This dude sent ten different puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.

    Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
     
    #4280     Mar 6, 2009