OK & this one... Top Ten Signs You Have a Bad Long-Distance Company 10. So-called "dial tone" is just a guy with a kazoo 9. Everyone you talk to sounds like the drive-through at Wendy's 8. All calls are ten cents for the first minute, $94 each additional minute 7. In the background of every call you make: giggling 6. When you tell the operator you're trying to call a friend in Vermont, she laughs and says, "Hey pal, this ain't the Jetsons!" 5. No matter what number you dial, the same guy answers 4. They insist on being paid with "ass, gas, or grass" 3. Every time you pick up the receiver, dirty gray water pours out 2. They bill you for calls made by somebody named Pepe, and when you complain, they say, "Whatsa problem, man, you no like Pepe?" 1. Their slogan is "Reach out and touch yourself" #4 reminds me of a bumper sticker I saw that said "ass grass or cash no one rides for free"
Last one, really... Top Ten Ways the U.S. Would Be Different If Evel Knievel Were President 10. Nation's interstate system would include regularly spaced jump ramps. 9. Giant flame decals added to side of Air Force One. 8. More fatalities at annual Easter egg hunt. 7. Court packed with judges favoring 270 mph speed limit. 6. Secretary of state would wear special suit to greet diplomats while on fire. 5. Son Robbie Knievel would be screwing up S&L industry. 4. White jumpsuit de rigeur at state dinners. 3. Quayle would still be Vice-President -- but his kids would take him seriously. 2. Americans closer to dream of seeing guy jump over his own face on Mt. Rush more. 1. More babies named Evel.
Great pix. A classic. maybe I'll print it and make a greeting card. Inside I'll write, "wish you were here, I really mean it, you fucking cunt"
How come the High Holidays of Christianity are represented by cartoon characters. Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny?????? You would n't see the Muslims adopt a duck w/a sailor hat for Ramadan, or the Jews license the Philly Phanatic for Passover.
Hey, look what I got on EBAY!!!! It's the chandeler from the Emperers' Club!!!! <img src=http://elitetrader.com/vb/attachment.php?s=&postid=1849178/>
Yeah, I know. It's been driving me nuts too. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=geBfyxqVGB8&feature=related
I'll tell you how I used to relax when I was a kid. I was about 10 or 12 and used to rip off all the labels on the canned goods in ma's cupboards. then I'd sit back and relax and see what the heck ma would open up next.
Bullshit. You used to beat your dick like it owed you money. That's how you took the edge off. Tell the truth. Be cool, fool.