Scotch with two drops of water . A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, 'I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today..' The bartender says, 'Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink. In fact, this one is on me.' As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, 'I would like to buy you a drink, too.' The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming up,' says the bartender. As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, 'I would like to buy you one, too.' The old woman says, 'Thank you. Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.' 'Coming right up,' the bartender says. As he gives her the drink, he says, 'Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?' The old woman replies, 'Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.'
Did you see???? Paris Hilton is reviewing movies for the NY Post. check this review out for "No Country........." "I laughed! I cried! I blew the guy sitting next to me."
lol on the medical fact. here's somemore medical yik yak. Recent medical studies at the University of CYGT suggest that posters in the chit chat forum have the highest rates of flatulence, breaking wind 1.3 times as often as those who post in the politcs and religon forums, the second most flatulent group, and 2.1 times as much as the least flatulent posters, who post in the Economics forum. However, posters in the Psychology forum rank at the top for smelliest flatulence, which may relate to a high incidence of obviousism and vaginaism in the area, relative to other regions in the crotch.
(sigh) I really wanted to keep going but ran out of time. My nap time buzzer went off. Mom gets made if I miss my nap. If you notice any strange writings, it's probably mom, she steals my password aand posts carzy shit.
Short stories..... -------------------- Once upon a time, she smiled... The nursing home smelled of circumstance. Untold stories blanketed the padded walls. Dear John: Return my stuff. Ciao! Columbus: See! The world isn't FLAâ Um. You just called me "Stephanie." My boyfriend is up for parole. "Nothing's wrong!" she screamed out. "Nothing!" Does this make my butt big? I pronounce you husband and strife. You got my ring on EBAY?! But he was always so quiet! For sale! Bear Stearns. Slight damage in the rear end..
Top Ten Easter Bunny Pet Peeves Constantly having to bail your brother, the Trix rabbit, out of the drunk tank You always spend the day after Easter plucking the buckshot out of your tail It's tough to get dates when you smell "eggy" Make one little mistake, and they turn your feet into keychains When people see you hopping around with a basket, they automatically assume you're gay Ass Having to work the other 364 days as a fry-cook at Denny's Jewish kids and their "hilarious" firecrackers News flash to all you wacky dads out there: you're not the first to come up with "Show me the bunny" Two words: rat traps