Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. Can't think of a Pinochile joke. How 'bout a Pinocchio joke?

    How does Pinocchio make love?

    The women sit on his face, and he tells lies.


    Oooo, Ooooo.

    Who's the only women who wakes up each day feeling grumpy, sleepy and dopey all at the same time?

    Snow White.
     
    #2161     Mar 19, 2008
  2. Let's see. Card playing fictional characters.........

    What did Scooby Doo say when he was 'all in' and drew to an inside straight?

    Rut Roe.

    Why was Scoobey such a bad poker player?

    Wagged his tail when he got a good hand.
     
    #2162     Mar 19, 2008
  3. Awww, come on. The Cayne bit was good. I don't know anything about Bridge, I crossed one once, as well as that line that defines good taste, but that's another story.

    How 'bout an "attaboy"?????
     
    #2163     Mar 19, 2008
  4. Ok, how;s this..

    Jack n' Jill went up the hill each with a buck and a quarter..

    Jill came down with 2.50.

    (she didn't go up for no water :D )
     
    #2164     Mar 19, 2008
  5. Much better, thanks boys...and GE came down too, great day! LOL

    Don :)
     
    #2165     Mar 19, 2008
  6. No problem. Got another show at 4:30 over at Bear's Hdq.

    I call it the, "Money Isn't Everything" Tour.

    You know, I didn't realize it, but in NY, they outsourced the Suicide Hotline to Pakistan.

    The other day, a trader who in the deferred comp program at Bear called, threatening suicide. They sent him a vest and a copy of the Koran.
     
    #2166     Mar 19, 2008
  7. duffman

    duffman

    Bear Meltdown Rhapsody

    (To the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody:)

    Is this the real price?
    Is this just fantasy?
    Financial landslide
    No escape from reality

    Open your eyes
    And look at your buys and see.
    I'm now a poor boy
    High yielding casualty

    Because I bought it high, watched it blow Rating high, value low Any way the Fed goes Doesn't really matter to me, to me.
    Mama - just killed my fund
    Quoted CDOs instead
    Pulled the trigger, now it's dead

    Mama - I had just begun
    These CDOs have blown it all away
    Mama - oooh
    I still wanna buy
    I sometimes wish I'd never left Goldman at all.

    I see a little silhouette of a Fed
    Bernanke! Benanke! Can you save the whole market?
    Monolines and munis - very very frightening me!
    Super senior, super senior
    Super senior CDO - magnifico

    I'm long of subprime, nobody loves me
    He's long of subprime CDO fantasy
    Spare the margin call you monstrous PB!
    Easy come easy go, will you let me go?

    Peloton! No - we will not let you go - let him go Peloton! We will not let you go - let him go Peloton! We will not let you go - let me go Will not let you go
    - let me go (never) Never let you go - let me go Never let me go - ooo No, no, no, no, no, no, no - Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go S&P had the devil put aside for me for me, for me, for me <guitar
    bridge> So you think you can fund me and spit in my eye?
    And then margin call me and leave me to die?

    Oh PB - can't do this to me PB
    Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here <guitar solo> Ooh yeah, ooh yeah No price really matters No liquidity Nothing really matters - no price really matters to me <instrumental ending> Anyway the Fed goes...
    <fade out>
     
    #2167     Mar 19, 2008
  8. When did Pinocchio realize he was made out of wood?

    When he was wacking off and his hand caught fire.
     
    #2168     Mar 19, 2008
  9. Spitzer haiku

    What the hell's the point
    Of having all this power
    Unless I get laid?
     
    #2169     Mar 19, 2008
  10. yo, yo, yo, bling, bling, I'm number two in the number two dept.


    Members Who Blow the Most Time Posting in the Chit Chat Forum and the Politics & Religion Forum:
    (Indicates users who basically have no social life outside of ET and need some sort of counseling! )

    ratboy88
    nutmeg


    (Indicates users who basically have no social life outside of ET and need some sort of counseling! )

    Been there done that.

    I should come clean. I'm surrounded by beautiful women 24/7, day in day out, week after week, month and month, year after year. I come here for male companionship, escape form the incessant chatter. You think I can tell these jokes to women?
     
    #2170     Mar 19, 2008