Ever notice when you're in line at an ATM how the person in front of you is slower than you are when you do your transaction? From a relativistic point of view you are slower than the person in line behind you. And he is slower than the person behind him. It's easy to see that the longer you extend the line the faster the people get at their transactions. At some point, someone will punch through the light barrier.
Wow. Damn funny, nutmeg... you've outdone yourself. Weird, wild stuff. Who needs those formulaic Writers Guild hacks? So, if I accidentally copy a paragraph or six in my online personals ad, to reel in my next prey, I mean, to connect with my lifetime soulmate, where shall I send the royalty checks?
A Polish family is sitting in the living room. The wife turns to the husband and says "Let's send the kids out to P-L-A-Y so we can fuck.
For mad scientists who keep brains in jars, here's a tip: why not add a slice of lemon to each jar, for freshness?
Well lot of jokes I have heard before mixed in with some ramblings here which make no sense. We all can get behind a good poop joke...
next time I see a guy laughing histerically in a public bathroom...you know.....figure he must have read the same joke.... reminds me of reminiscences of a poop operator type of thingy....
A man walked into a 7-11, put a $20 bill on the counter and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer? $15.00. Question. If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, was a crime committed?