"Oh, I am so drunk......everythings blurry. Thank god, looking at that hay cart of an ass. And, I missed my nose completely......"
Kinda fits w/ the Bill and Hillary Pic: Posted on Thu, Feb. 21, 2008 Police arrest man suspected of having sex with a dog BY STAN FINGER The Wichita Eagle A woman responding to a break-in in her garage found a man having sexual intercourse with her 4-year-old female rottweiler, police said Wednesday. The woman called police Tuesday night after finding the 20-year-old man. Police arrested the man, who they say had a prior conviction for the same crime less than six months ago. "This is the first time that I've ever seen this... and I've been in law enforcement a long time," said Lt. Sam Hanley, who leads the department's sex crimes unit. The man was booked into Sedgwick County Jail on suspicion of criminal sodomy and aggravated burglary. The burglary was included because the man is suspected of breaking into the garage while someone was home, police said. He had lived with the family for a while last year in the 3700 block of East Clark, police said. The man pleaded no contest to having sex with an animal last September in Reno County and was fined $353, according to court documents. He also can be found on an Internet Web site where people show photos and tell stories about sex with animals, Capt. Darrell Haynes said.spend just a minute or so thinking about this. Nut, if you ever really start to worry that you're fucked up, you are, but I mean if you worry about it. Think of this. You, first off, want to have sex with animals. Then, you have to meet other people who have sex with animals. Then, at you Amway party, one guy (girl?) says, "Hey, I got an idea..........." And the next thing you know, you and your pals are on the Internet. Wonder what the popup ads feature? The rottweiler was not injured, Hanley said, but a Kansas Humane Society spokeswoman said the incident still qualifies as animal cruelty. "It is abuse," said Jennifer Campbell, director of communications for the Kansas Humane Society. "That is committing a violent act toward that animal." Campbell said she hopes investigators explore whether the incident was an attempt to strike out at the dog's owners. "That's where a lot of animal cruelty starts," she said. Research has shown that perpetrators "are frustrated and angry and upset, and animals are vulnerable," Campbell said. Reach Stan Finger at 316-268-6437 or sfinger@wichitaeagle.com. © 2007 Wichita Eagle and wire service sources. All Rights Reserved. http://www.kansas.com
Now I'm thinking, you have to tell a story about having sex with animals. I figure, the Rotts in the garage, you toss her a steak, and while shes' chowin' down, you're on her like sansabelt slacks on a fat guy. But, I guess there's more, but what? "so, I'm robbin' this house, and there's a Rottweiler in the garage. I'm thinking right off she llikes me, because she's not barking. She's looking at me out of the corner of her eye, head cocked, if you know what I mean. I sort of forget why I'm in this guy's garage w/a crowbar. I sort of shuffle over to her, and offer te back of my hand for a sniff............."
There was a reddish haired, freckled faced black guy in our town who was caught having sex with chickens and sent to prison. When he was released and came back home, he was forever referred to as " road island red". True story.
If I remember correctly, the custom in Kazakhstan, when you have sex with a chicken is to "give" the chicken to a neighbor. Probably most people would not want to give up their dog. Also, missing from the story, is the dogs version of events.
Red was stealing and then killing the chickens after he had sex with them. That is how the police caught him, when they staked out the spot where he was leaving the chickens.
The fox gaurding the hen house was noticeably disgusted. "How can anyone expect me to eat chicken." "Who knows where that chickens ass has been."
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from this guy. How do you screw a chicken? I mean, there are so many more appealing farm animals than chickens.