Astrological Chickens Zodiacal Influence on Chicken Crossing Behaviour VIRGO (August 23 to September 22): Virgos are practical and adaptable. They have a strong desire to succeed, are very discriminating and tend to be critical of others. They strive for perfection. They are very poultriatarian and will usually cross for the good of other chickens and because it is the proper or correct thing to do. LIBRA (September 23 to October 22): Libra chickens are thoughtful and sensitive, and are always seeking balance and harmony. They need the respect and love of other chickens more than any other group. They think carefully before making any decision. Libra chickens are prone to stop in the middle of the road to try to decide which way to go, making the crossing a considerable risk to themselves and others. SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21): Scorpios have a depth and intensity of their emotions that gives them a strong inner power. They are creatures of passion whose focused desires assist them in achieving their aims. They can be ruthlessly self-critical in their quest for truth. They are uncompromising, and stick to any commitment they have made. They cross because they promised to do so. SAGITTARIUS (November 23 to December 21): These chickens are restless and visionary. They love to explore new horizons and see life as a journey full of adventure. They greet every new experience with a warm heart, a ready smile and an open mind. They cross the road because of a passion to see more of the world and a spirit which longs to be free. CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19): Capricorns are very ambitious and are always striving to reach the top of the coop. They are tenacious in planning every step to achieve their goals, and leave themselves little time to relax before looking for new peaks to climb. They cross because they must to achieve the success they feel should be theirs. AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18): Chickens born under the sign of Aquarius are strong independent spirits longing to break free from traditional conventions and restrictions and the status quo. They are innovative and idealistic always replacing old outdated thinking with fresh perspectives. They are strongly driven to oppose social injustice and oppression. They are always experimenting to discover their own identity. They will cross because it is forbidden to do so and by doing so it will be easier for others to do so in the future. PISCES (February 19 to March 20): Pisces chickens are dreamy and sensitive. They are blessed with deep intuition and a wealth of emotion. Pisces are romantic, creative and full of love for the three girls who spent money on a party dress but wha? wha? wha am I suppossed to tell them now? No party at Traders Monthly?. Their imagination is so strong that it frequently merges with fantasy. They usually cross because they had a vision telling them that this is the means to the happiness they are striving to achieve. ARIES (March 21 to April 19): Chickens born under the sign of Aries are natural leaders possessing a Bullship spirit, who wish to make their mark on the world. They cross the road to assert themselves and seek action, daring and adventure. TAURUS (April 20 to May 20): Taurus chickens are strong willed and have a down to earth attitude toward life. They are overly interested in material things and have a real need for some bah mitzvah cash (little more this time than the 12k from the last one). They feel unsettled unless comfortable. They will cross only for a game of "shots for stocks" or to obtain material possessions. GEMINI (May 21 to June 20): They are highly restless and are always seeking a wide variety of contrasting experiences. They cross because they are curious and to avoid the boredom of a CYGT existence. CANCER (June 21 to July 22): While having a tough shell-like exterior, Cancer chickens are very sensitive and vulnerable. They have very delicate emotions, and tend to get overly excited when disinvited to a Trader Monthly Parteee. They have a constant and urgent need to publish and always act defensively. They will only cross the road when bagholding. LEO (July 20 to August 22): Leo chickens are majestic and proud with personalities that need to shine, and greet opportunities with fervor and vitality. They always need to be in charge. They will cross the road with great enthusiasm for the opportunity to sell a penny stocking DVD.
The 5 things any man wants: 1. Itâs important to have a woman, who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job. 2. Itâs important to have a woman, who can make you laugh. 3. Itâs important to have a woman, whom you can trust and who doesnât lie to you. 4. Itâs important to have a woman, who is good in bed and who likes to be with you. 5. Itâs very, very important that these four women do not know each other.
Listen up guys, I got about 9 or 10,000 of these fucken fucks. These are standard bricks, Please don't waste my time with endless fucking e-mails asking me what they are used for. (Although, I took a couple along when I used to be a hot air balloon enthusiat and dropped them on barn roofs, you outta see the cows run out of the barn when those fuckers hit) Now I'mup here on the third floor with these fucken bricks and my wife needs the space in the closet. You'll notice I keep these right next to my bed, on top of my paper, me and the neighbors cats enjoy a late night game "hello you mutha fucking com'ere kitty, kitty"
Nutmeg in the news... http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080220...stralia_art;_ylt=ApcX7AtHqNQR9FUo02zGk2ChOrgF I could do that, but my brush is too big!
The Mexican Smuggler Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He's got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What''s in the bags?" "Sand," answered Juan. The guard says, "We'll just see about that get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man''s shoulders, and lets him cross the border. Next day, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?" "Sand," says Juan. The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand.He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle. This sequence of events if repeated every day for three years. Finally, Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard meets him in a Cantina in Mexico. "Hey, Buddy," says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Here's $100 for your secret: Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?" Juan sips his beer and says, "Bicycles!"
Duck Humor Two ducks go on their honeymoon and stay in a hotel. As they are about to make love, the male duck says, ''Oh, we haven't got any condoms. I'll ring down to room service.'' He calls and asks for some condoms. The woman says, ''OK sir, would you like to put them on your bill?'' ''No can do, ma'am,'' he says, ''I'll suffocate!''
Re; Mexcian smuggler, I was a pioneer in that field. My first job in a lumber yard, I was walking out with wheelbarrows full of sawdust. My boss was glad to get rid of it, I told him I was using sawdust as mulch in my garden. Ah yes, selling wheelbarrows paid my tuition for Rodeo Clown College.
Another Blonde Joke Two blondes are enjoying a quiet car ride. The driver blonde asks the one in the passenger seat to check if her blinker is working. So that one looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No...''