Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. Yannis

    Yannis

    Hey, nutmeg, imo, this would have been a little fullier if you hadn't put in the first mention of Hillary in the second paragraph... Just build the joke with the other people and explode the Hillary connection at the end. Just a thought. :)
     
    #1661     Feb 1, 2008
  2. You're right. As I re-read it, what you said makes more sense, thanks. It doesn't flow the way it is written. Too many interuptions this am. Worse yet, I'm drinking a new blend of coffee, pretty wired.
     
    #1662     Feb 1, 2008
  3. This is unacceptable behaviour for the joke thread. Nutmeg please feel free to kick yourself in the ass.

    Thanks
     
    #1663     Feb 1, 2008
  4. #1664     Feb 1, 2008
  5. Kick myself in the ass?

    My chickens love me
    They are always hot for me
    But their eggs taste wierd
     
    #1665     Feb 1, 2008
  6. #1666     Feb 1, 2008
  7. I understand. The nut bra is funny.
     
    #1667     Feb 1, 2008
  8. I got one of those. I have cleavage now. Is that wrong?

    This was better than the relish jokes. they didn't cut the mustard. I'm not saying that, if you were in a pickle, they wouldn't make you smile, but in the sausage casing we call "life", well, I guess I'll have to be frank, they suck.:) :) :)
     
    #1668     Feb 1, 2008
  9. A woman hired a contractor to repaint the interior of her house. The
    woman walked the man through the second floor of her home and told him
    what colors she wanted for each room. As they walked through the first
    room, the woman said, "I think I would like this room in a cream
    color."

    The contractor wrote on his clipboard, walked to the window, opened it
    and yelled out, "Green side up!" He then closed the window and
    continued following the woman to the next room. The woman looked
    confused, but proceeded with her tour. "In this room, I was thinking
    of an off blue." Again, the contractor wrote this down, went to the
    window, opened it and yelled out, "Green side up!"

    This baffled the woman, but she was hesitant to say anything. In the
    next room, the woman said she would like it painted in a light rose
    color. And once more, the contractor opened the window and yelled,
    "Green side up!"

    Struck with curiosity, the woman mustered up the nerve to ask, "Why do
    you keep yelling 'Green side up' out my window every time I tell you
    the color I would like the room?"

    The contractor replied, "Because I have a crew of blondes laying sod
    across the street."
     
    #1669     Feb 1, 2008
  10. Have you ever sat on a plane, next to an irritating co- traveler who keeps talking to you and snooping at everything you read?

    Next time, just follow these simple instructions:

    And get ready to enjoy your well-deserved privacy.

    1. Quietly and calmly open up your laptop case.

    2. Remove your laptop, and open it.

    3. Start up.

    4. Make sure the guy annoying you can see the screen.

    5. Close your eyes and tilt your head up to the sky.

    Take a very deep breath..

    6. Then open this web address...

    http://tinyurl.com/34fzpf
     
    #1670     Feb 1, 2008