Jokes 2

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by gwb-trading, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. I just had a thought:

    towel a band. How appropriate.
     
    #1591     Jan 28, 2008
  2. Saw a billboard that said:

    Need help?
    Call Jesus.
    1-800-555-3787

    So I did and a Mexican showed up with a tow truck!
     
    #1592     Jan 28, 2008
  3. A young kid's in a shipwreck and he winds up stranded on a tropical island. For twenty years he never sees another human being. Then one day a beautiful girl with long blond hair, her clothes half-ripped off, washes up on a piece of driftwood. He explains to her how he existed for twenty years, digging for clams, and eating fruits and berries.

    She says, "Well, what did you do for love?" He says, "Love? What's that?" She says, "I'll show you." She shows him. Then she shows him again. Then she shows him one more time. When they're finally done, she says, "Well, how do you like love?"

    He says, "It's great. But look what you did to my clam digger."
     
    #1593     Jan 28, 2008
  4. clamdigger. One of my favorites. 1957.
     
    #1594     Jan 28, 2008
  5. Paddy O'Conner's wife opened the door to see Paddy's boss from the Guinness plant.

    "I have sad sad news to report to ya Mrs O'Conner. Paddy was in a bad accident at the plant and has passed on. He fell into a vat of Stout and drowned" he said.

    She replied "Oh dear god, I hope he didn't suffer much. Was it a quick death?"

    "No, I'm sorry to say it wasn't. Poor Paddy had to climb out three times to pee!"
     
    #1595     Jan 28, 2008
  6. lol. Joke probably is that old. OTH, it is rather refresing getting old, the stuff I forget looks new.:D
     
    #1596     Jan 28, 2008
  7. I making lists of my favorite jokes, movies with wierd endings. I have it in a spot so when I get Alzheimer's, probably at the end of next week the way things are going, she can recycle the stuff to me.

    Come to think of it, one movie, one book, one joke oughta do it. why do the extra work?

    And I never heard the clamdigger joke, btw. I'm not particularly sorry, but I never heard it.:D
     
    #1597     Jan 29, 2008
  8. I boxed up the family Bible to mail to my sister. At the post office the guy axed me if I wanted the parcel "insured". I said "What's that mean?" (such a fn smart ass).

    He said is anything breakable in the box.

    I said just the ten commandmants

    ahahahahahahaaaa :D
     
    #1598     Jan 29, 2008
  9. whatever you do nutmeg, don't quit your day job....
     
    #1599     Jan 29, 2008
  10. We are in luck. This is my day job.
     
    #1600     Jan 29, 2008