Sometimes the headlines just write themselves... Pair caught with ketamine-filled Kinder eggs in their bums at Creamfields "They had multiple opportunities to re-think what they were doing." https://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/uk-news/pair-caught-ketamine-filled-kinder-30087785
What will happen if all men die except one man, while all the women stay? Me: Hey, how you doing? Crush: Sorry I have a boyfriend already! Me: What? How? When? Didn't the apocalypse kill every single male on Earth? Crush: Yeah, but he was in a research station at Mars digging rocks at that time! So we're in a long distance relationship! Please don't think of me as a rock-digger bitch. I hope you understand. We can still be friends right? Me: Sure!
: My father once happened to be sitting next to a Navy SEAL on a flight. Being the charismatic gentleman that he is, my dad struck up conversation with this SEAL. Naturally, the SEAL started to divulge a bunch of cool war stories that impressed my old man. One of these involved being dropped into Grenada during the fiasco in the 80’s. Eventually, as the conversation progressed, my father noticed something odd about the SEAL. He was acting uncontrollably nervous, sweating bullets (no pun intended), stammering and not to mention he had hammered down about 3 Scotches, on a morning flight no less. My father was perplexed that this elite warrior was suddenly acting so jittery and unsettling out of nowhere. It sort of diffused the whole Navy SEAL demeanor. Finally, my dad asked the SEAL: “Hey man. I've noticed you've been acting very nervous. For a guy like you that’s been on the frontlines of battle, that has been all over the world, that is at the top of the top of all soldiers, what on earth has you so uneasy???” His response: “I'm on my way to my wedding.”