Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!" Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island. An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks, "Esther, did we pay our $5,000 PBS pledge check yet?" "No, sweetheart," she responds. Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Esther, did we pay our American Express card yet?" "Oh, no! I’m sorry. I forgot to send the check," she says. "One last thing, Esther. Did you remember to send checks for the Visa and MasterCard this month?" he asks. "Oh, forgive me, Abie," begged Esther. "I didn’t send that one, either." Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years. Esther pulls away and asks him, "What was that for?" Abe answers, "They’ll find us
Once upon a Halloween night, a couple received an invitation to a masked fancy dress party. Unfortunately, the wife developed a terrible headache, forcing her to stay home while urging her husband to go and have a great time without her. Reluctantly, he agreed and took off to the party in his costume. After about an hour of restful sleep, the wife woke up feeling refreshed and decided to surprise her husband by joining the festivities. Since he had no idea what her costume would be, she saw an opportunity for some mischievous fun, wanting to witness his behavior when he didn't know she was there. As she entered the party, she spotted her husband gallivanting on the dance floor, twirling and flirting with every attractive person in sight. Feeling a mix of amusement and curiosity, she approached him and, using her own seductive charms, managed to steal his attention away from his current dance partner. The night progressed, and the drinks flowed freely. Eventually, her husband whispered a proposition in her ear, and she, playfully agreeing, led him to one of the parked cars for a passionate rendezvous in the backseat. Just before midnight, she slipped away, returned home, hid her costume, and snuggled into bed, wondering how her husband would explain his wild behavior. As he walked through the door, she asked him about his evening, curious to hear his side of the story. "Oh, you know, it was the same old thing," he replied. "I never have a good time when you're not there." Eager for more information, she questioned, "Did you dance a lot?" With a sheepish grin, he casually responded, "Honestly, I didn't even dance once. As soon as I arrived, I bumped into Pete, Bill Brown, and a few other guys. We ended up in the spare room playing poker all night"... "But let me tell you, the guy I lent my costume to had the time of his life!"