One day, Einstein has to speak at an important science conference. On the way there, he tells his driver that looks a bit like him, "I'm sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!" The driver agrees, "You're right. As your driver, I attended all of them, and even though I don't know anything about science, I could give the conference in your place." "That's a great idea!" says Einstein. "Let's switch places then!" So they switch clothes and as soon as they arrive, the driver dressed as Einstein goes on stage and starts giving the usual speech, while the real Einstein, dressed as the car driver, attends it. But in the crowd, there is one scientist who wants to impress everyone and thinks of a very difficult question to ask Einstein, hoping he won't be able to respond . So this guy stands up and interrupts the conference by posing his very difficult question. The whole room goes silent, holding their breath, waiting for the response. The driver looks at him, laughs, and says, "Sir, your question is so easy to solve, that I'm going to let my driver answer it!"
Three women have just entered heaven. They are standing in front of an angel and St. Peter to find out what kinds of special privileges they'll have while there. Saint Peter says to the women, "I only have one question. Have you lived a chaste life?" The first woman answers, "I have only had sex with one man, my husband. And our first time was on our wedding night. " St. Peter turns to the angel and says, "Ah, a woman who has lived as God intended, and certainly deserving of reward." "Give her a key to the golden room." The second woman says, "I have never known a man's touch. I was a nun, and stayed in the sisterhood since I was only a young lass." St. Peter turned to the angel and said, "Truly exceptional, a woman who has gone above and beyond in service of God." "Give her a key to the platinum room!" The third woman says, "I slept with 239 dudes. 67 before I met my husband, 35 while we were dating, 12 while we were engaged, 78 while we were married and 46 after he died." St. Peter stood stunned for a second, then leaned over to the angel and whispered, "Give her a key to MY room."
Gen X/Boomers for teh win. There's one more funny they could have added to that sign... "Coyote handing out business card with name on it, claiming genius status."
funny shit: https://www.elitetrader.com/et/threads/why-germanys-business-model-is-busted.368736/#post-5645250